Men vs Women · Society

Social-Climbing is a Three-Generations Project

In the comments section we recently had a discussion about social climbing and the fact that good-looking women may get lucky and ascend to the highest levels of societ, simply by giving a wealthy man a boner and that guy following his desires. There are plenty such examples. For instance, a prominent one in German politics, due to the fact that she was close to former chancellor Angela Merkel, is Friede Springer. She went from working class to billionaire class by spreading her legs for Axel Springer, one of the richest men in Germany. All it took was getting in close proximity to him by working as a nanny in his household.

In contrast, there is no comparable path for good-looking men. Sure, there may be outliers like Jeremy Meeks who went from federal prison to boinking the daughter of a rich businessman. Still, I think it would be a bit of a stretch to argue that he managed to arrive in high society and become bosom buddies with British prime ministers. For the remote chance of that to happen you need to play the long game. Let’s start with a simple but by no means easy-to-achieve example: you are a middle-class nobody until one day you have a great business idea, which makes you many millions of dollars. This is great for you but this does not mean that you can now hob-nob with the elites. Maybe they invite you to fundraising dinners but you will not be one of them. As you lack social graces, which come from a particular upbringing, they may even snub you.

The second generation will be a lot better off in that regard, however. You can send your sons to expensive boarding schools where they get to mingle with the scions of other wealthy families. This also happens to your family. In the first generation you were part of the “nouveau riche” but as your children were born into money, they are wealthy. This distinction even holds if the “wealthy” have less money than the nouveau riche. They still think they are better than them.

If you are born into money, you acquire a certain savoir vivre, a carefree way of life, which makes it very easy to alienate 99% of society but it also enables you to connect quickly with your peers at expensive boarding schools and private universities. This background also opens up career paths other people can only dream about. Once you are there, you better hope that your family is able to maintain its wealth instead of having some offspring who are more interested in doing drugs and partying, which does not seem to be a rare occurrence.

The same three-generation development applies at lower levels in society, too. Let’s say you are from the working class but you work your way up to a solid income, be it a good blue-collar job that allows you to provide for your family or some white collar gig at BigCorp. Your parents probably did not have a piano at home and music lessons in general, regardless of the instrument, where completely out of reach. These only happened in a different world. However, as you get older, you decide to dabble a bit in music and may even take some lessons yourself. Having to work for a living, it is not easy to find the time to practice but you want your children to have a better starting position.

As a consequence of the social aspirations you foster for your children, you buy a piano and pay for private tuition. However, as your piano skills are severely lacking, you cannot help your children all that much. Yet, if they have a modicum of talent and put in a lot of effort, they will achieve a reasonable degree of competency, simply by virtue of dedicating themselves to this hobby. However, they surely will not reach their full potential. Your children, however, are now in a family that values music, which is a distinct step above from mainstream associations with the working class. In the third generation, however, this inter-generational effort will start to really pay off. As your children will be reasonably competent in playing the piano, your grandchildren will be able to get a lot of support at home. Of course, music is just one facet that fits into the bigger picture of your family having ascended from the working to the middle or upper-middle class and there surely are other socioeconomic markers they have picked up along the way.

All of this is hard work that takes close to a century, assuming that your male offspring likely will not procreate before the age of 30. If you and your firstborn son procreate at 35, it takes a mere 35 + 35 + 20 = 90 years to have a well-rounded grandson in your family. Three generations also seem to be a good genealogical limit as only very old and established families keep memories of their ancestors alive beyond that level. Almost everyone reading this article probably does not know anything about their great-grandparents, for instance.

Rising through the ranks of society, as a man, takes a century. As a good-looking woman, though, it may feel like an eternity to get pounded by some aging billionaire but this is a cheat code for life that is not accessible to men. We need to suck it up for multiple generations to get ahead. While doing so, however, we advance all of society.

34 thoughts on “Social-Climbing is a Three-Generations Project

  1. A very good analysis Sleazy .
    But don’t be so defeatist 😛

    There are other ways and means.
    Watch the movies the’ Talented Mr Ripley’ and ‘Gattica.’ For examples strategies and how to do so I reckon.

    It has been done IRL ! 👌

    I’m gonna google deep dive on good looking broke ass male models & gigalos to see if any of these dudes have done this successfully.
    Ie broken’ up ‘ through social stata hierarchies to make it into the upper classes. I’m sure it’s possible for men also .

    1. I wouldn’t be so quick to point out rare exceptions or, in this case, possibly completely fictional cases of climbing the social ladder. I also don’t think the article is defeatist. Think of more as a broad and realistic template of how normies enter the higher echelons of society. I don’t view it as pessimistic or what have you because I’ve never known anyone personally to transcend this barrier. It’s just not something most people ever get to witness, much less experience in a lifetime. Of course, the more humble blue/white collar aspirations are more commonly exceptional, though still relatively rare.

    2. I am not defeatist at all. In fact, socially I am quite adaptable, to no small degree probably due to my innate irreverence. A lot of the scions of wealthy families also have this personality trait. They got it because their money allows them to take few things seriously. In my case, I simply see through bullshit and because I do not care much about wanting to fit in, I can make statements many would not dare to make. One of the most interesting aspects about being a polarizing figure is that you get noticed, and sometimes quite positively, which can lead to opportunities you otherwise would not have. However, I do not think that it realistic to expect to be able to inveigle your way into the upper classes.

    3. There’s a few examples here of the vice versa ;
      But this piece is limited to the acting /hollywood World;

      https://money.com/25-rich-guys-with-even-richer-wives/

      I would say Justin Theroux and Jennifer Aniston is an example of it for sure. Maybe Joe Mangianello and Sofia Vergara perhaps. It’s a different “upper class” for sure but still , some evidence of the reverse situation.

      I have yet to find stories of male models and heiresses but likely some of those would be toyboys and playthings to the elite. Perhaps not married into though. Certainly a harder job.

      It’s a good blog piece Sleazy but to some extent isn’t it obvious what you are saying? Don’t the avg lay person know that the elites and upper classes are extremely ‘Snobby’ and have closed shops and social circles that are extremely hard to break into?

      Your theory is 3 generations. It could be more 5 ..what’s your basis for 3 is there IRL examples of this to be seen?

      And do you aspire to break into these classes btw in your legacy..(?)

      I’d also mention it depends on the amount of money made by Gen 1 . Elon musk I doubt has any problem getting accepted by any upper class 😆 Or any of the others of his wealth status
      ——-
      The mention of the attitude of “savour faire” and “irreverence “among the rich is more interesting to me that’s very observable IME.
      If you could expand on that in another blog piece with examples that’d be great.
      Regardless of wealth that’s a very charismatic and intriguing trait that is itself attractive imo.
      ———-
      Also you hit a good point with being ‘polarising’’.

      That’s a great trait to have.
      As it shows strong opinions and values etc etc
      Ie “people either love him or hate him”

      There’s evidence wrt OD analysis that profiles that are ‘polarising’ do the best in terms of matches and dates. It was POF data I believe
      .
      A common line touted in some dating courses was “if you try to appeal to everyone , you appeal to no-one”.
      Best to be polarising in OD I think because chicks screen so f’n hard. While they sit on the couch is flannel pjs eating Doritos swiping left to pass some idle time, looking Mr Right 🙄

  2. Speaking of fictional examples playing out in real life, has anyone seen that movie Crazy Rich Asians? It’s about this massively wealthy family from Singapore where the son travels to America and finds his true love (think Coming to America with Eddie Murphy). Anyway, the chick apparently has no idea who the guy she is dating actually is, and ends up flying to Singapore to meet his family. She is shunned by the mother and grandmother as they claim she is just some low-class entitled American parasite trying to weasel her way into their good graces. Anyways, the whole premise reminds me of Meghan Markle snagging Prince Harry, except in the movie they paint the lead female as innocent.

    1. I watched this movie years ago. An interesting aspect is that the Asian elites very commonly exhibit the behaviors associated with the nouveau riche. Essentially, this is what they are. I have to say that it is quite jarring to see some woman who is wearing an outfit, including shoes and accessories, that surely cost well above $100k spit on the ground like some lowly farmhand. I briefly knew the daughter of a very wealthy Chinese family. One of her most favorite conversation topics was how much certain shoes or handbags cost. Most bizarrely, she once thought she could impress me by telling me how much she paid for her coat. One of the greatest injustices in her life was that her family had more money than most or all the families of her friends but her friends were given more money. This led to excesses such as them getting custom-made items from well-known designers, such as a pair of high-heels with golden wings attached to them, which looked utterly ridiculous, that cost her friend fifty thousand euros.

    2. “i briefly knew the daughter of a very wealthy Chinese family. One of her most favorite conversation topics was how much certain shoes or handbags cost.”

      I’ve known chick who were barely middle-class who would obsess over this type of crap. It’d be more about gawking at some relatively well off person’s vehicle, for example. And then browsing expensive handbags and imagining how amazing it would be to own one. Just basically being easily impressed by status symbols. I remember one chick was really into some super rich Indian family and their extravagant wedding. I mean, I simply just can’t relate. I might care about fancy custom suits, gigantic house and cool cars if I had hundreds of millions maybe. But I see people in the same income bracket as me all the time with hundreds of thousands of debt trying to keep up with appearances. The so-called 30k millionaire, as you put it.

  3. Funny how Cheeky mentions Gattaca. I have played with the thought experiment a few times in the past about being supremely rich and having fully refined Genetic Engineering technology at my disposal. Make my children absolute geniuses with as close to perfect human (maybe even non-human. at that point, we might be able to adopt certain genes from animals that will make our youth last longer, give us eagle sight, lizard’s ability to regenerate limbs, etc. but I don’t wanna speculate too much on that) genetics as possible so as to give them the greatest chance of being able to advance human civilization.

    I’ve already spoken before about being staunchly childfree. These fictional circumstances are about the only thing that might budge me from that position. and honestly, I probably still wouldn’t do it in that scenario. I’m not exactly eager to shoulder such a ginormous responsibility of properly raising children to become world changers and I very much doubt I even have what it takes to do the job properly. but this obviously fictional prospect is about the only thing that would make me doublethink my position. (if I’m going to have kids and sacrifice my freedom and personal aspirations, it had better be for a massively beneficial cause like this.)

    From the thought experiment, It almost feels as though that if you want to raise your children to ultimately make something of themselves and not just become another one of those spoiled rich brats who are essentially just wastes of space, your money must only go into investing towards their self-development. Like homeschooling your children with specialized teachers/instructors of varied fields (we’ve talked about this before), getting them into a variety of athletics while young to build a base of Fitness and Athleticism that will serve them for life, etc. The freedom they have as a result of your wealth must be invested towards promoting the pursuit of worldly experience, and not drowning into hedonism.

    But ironically, by raising your children this way as a super rich guy, you probably alienate them from being able to mingle with those born into the upper class. They may not develop that “savoir vivre” that you speak of. As a result, the world of the upper class may be closed off to them.

    Would such an opportunity cost be worth it to ensure development of Strong Character into your children? I don’t know. Again, I am far from an expert on the subject, this is just brainstorming to me.

    1. Maou-

      Love that movie. And some interesting sci-fi ideas you laid out there. Super rich,GE tech to create super non-human kids 😆 👍 great stuff .. could be screenplay one those ideas there mate 😎

      Re your comment of being ‘staunchly kid free’.

      Ummm.. well this may be a bit of a bomb to drop to you but… having offspring and tearing them is actually kinda the ‘ meaning of life’ dude 😆 (imo)

      Survive and replicate . Survive and thrive.
      That’s the objective of all life on planet earth more or less. (!) Imo anyway. Very obvious to me since I had kids that one.
      That’s why Black Pill seems ridiculous (and very immature ) thinking to me. It results in a lose-lose in the Game Of Life.
      No offspring = no decendants = no further bloodline or success from it.

      Ask any older woman or man who is childless if they could go back and change anything for proof of this opinion.

      Jus’ sayin! ☝️

      Ps – I’m 40s separated dad and considering meeting younger women post wall and having more kids. As many as I can tbh. I won’t be around forever …call me loco but it’s clear to me re the above being the point of my existence here on earth.

      Pretty deep stuff hey!

    2. And some opinions re the last 2 paragraphs.
      There’s a critical flaw in the thinking that as a parent you can actually “mould” your children.
      Each Child that is born is a lottery mix of DNA.
      Kids are infused with a ‘personality’ in utero. For real.
      Each one comes out to the world with almost a set personality type and 2 kids of the same parents can be very different indeed.

      There are theories that I’d subscribe to now as a dad that say the most impact of parenting style is in the first 5 years when kids core psychological outlook on their world is formed.
      Their psych feelings of security/ safety/belonging/importance etc.
      after that their success in the world even with the best most “perfect “parenting may well be luck and chance. even in the wealthy classes. *

      *A TV show like Sucession would be a good example of this re the range of personality types and success in the offspring of a mega wealthy media tycoon. I’m sure this translates well to real life stories of same.

      Seriously every healthy child is a miricle tbh.
      Have them! Raring kids is a man’s *real* purpose and certainly a woman’s also.

    3. And if I may wank on..the most important thing your can give your kids as a father is TIME bro not money.

      My time and passing down my learning of the world to them through my *Stories* . (Young Kids learn everything important via storytelling )

      Here’s the kicker of life –
      What’s the one thing no amount of money can buy more of ..? that’s right TIME.
      Same for a homeless person as it is for Elon Musk and his Zillions of dollars.
      (Altho Musk will no doubt try to Freeze himself for the future 😆)

      Can’t buy more time.

      Have kids is my advice!
      Every healthy child born is a miracle imo if I haven’t said it already.

      Sheeit I’m almost tearing up writing that.
      Children have a powerful effect on a man I tells ya! They are my world now and my outlook on llife has changed completely since I had them. For real. Everything takes second place now (and most of it is laughable and small stuff now also.) they are so f’n precious mate. I’d near kill a man with my bare hands if he touched my kids. There’s a powerful set of instincts and actual complete ‘ Evo circuitry’ in a man’s brain and body that is ‘dormant ‘ until he becomes a father imo. It activates on fatherhood. For real.

      And if a man has a few ,odds are at least one of them will be practically a ‘clone’ of him.

      So you get to clone yourself ..! nothing cooler than that!! 😎 😆

    4. “Ask any older woman or man who is childless if they could go back and change anything for proof of this opinion.”

      I already know and hanged out with several “older people” who made the decision. they remain convinced they made the right choice.

      “Ummm.. well this may be a bit of a bomb to drop to you but… having offspring and tearing them is actually kinda the ‘ meaning of life’ dude”

      – believe me, I’ve heard it all before. My response: We humans are capable of being much, MUCH more than our biological urges/imperative. Isaac Newton never had kids, but he’s contributed far, FAR to the benefit and development of humanity than the vast majority of “parents”. There’s more than one way to leave a “legacy”. (if you really care about it that much)

      “Have kids is my advice!”
      Parenthood isn’t for everybody, and the mainstream narrative that it is is not only untrue, but harmful.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sP2tUW0HDHA

      You think trash like Clevon and Trish here need to be encouraged to keep perpetuating and inflicting their stupidity unto the world? I don’t.

      “There’s a critical flaw in the thinking that as a parent you can actually “mould” your children.”

      – I’m already aware of all this. and its part of the reason I’m not enticed to take up the “responsibility” even with all those sci-fi resources. I didn’t get into all those other factors because it would have turned my comment into a thesis paper. lol

      “imo”

      I suggest you keep that in mind. Consider that there are people with a very, very different point of view in contrast to yours.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iLLi-wLdP10&list=PLmMWrvi76NIq4xCgn7ToaXAirE99ikigv&index=1

      Just food for thought.

    5. Once the people and organizations who are pushing the don’t-have-kids narrative stop focusing on whites but instead tell us about the problem of overpopulation in Africa, India, and the Middle East, we can start to have a conversation. Until then I am inclined to dismiss this as nothing but anti-white propaganda.

    6. One more thing that needs to be addressed:

      “Ps – I’m 40s separated dad and considering meeting younger women post wall and having more kids.”

      – Didn’t you say at some point here earlier that you have no interest in a serious relationship? If you’re really going to go through with what you said, you had better be ready to actually be a Father to these children. Because leaving behind a trail of fatherless children helps nobody. Not you (unless you like chaos in your life and having the law harass you for child support), not society, and most definitely not the children themselves.

    7. I did not watch that video but the title alone makes me wonder if this is an attempt to shift the blame from women to men. The vast, vast majority of divorces is initiated by women, so how does it make sense to focus on “absent fathers”?

    8. @Maou

      “ We humans are capable of being much, MUCH more than our biological urges/imperative. Isaac Newton never had kids, but he’s contributed far, FAR to the benefit and development of humanity than the vast majority of “parents”. There’s more than one way to leave a “legacy”. (if you really care about it that much)“

      Using Newton as an example 🤔 that really is cherry picking now. Yes there are The Greats some of which were childless. And that is a noble endeavour and aspiration. But are you going to be the next Isaac Newton? No. For the layman or average professional having kids is the smarter move imo

      I’d Meta frame it this way –
      In 40-50 years (or so) this blog and everyone on it will cease to exist. Without children a man’s genetics ,bloodline, talents and intelligence do not get passed on. It is a biological imperative to reproduce and continue on. Probably the most primary driving force of nature. As all a man’s achievements are quickly forgotten pretty soon after he dies. (For sure) Grandparents know this and it is why they shower attention and love on their grandkids as they are old . And can see in later years the importance of children and their legacy. We are all but a flash in the pan on the evolutionary timeline and not around for long really in that meta- view.

      Pretty sure the Stoics thoughts of things and write it that way also in the core textbooks of Stoicism. Family and legacy is most important.

      I wonder if those older folks you spoke with are all male. Hard to understand as this “dormant circuitry” I spoke of does not ‘activate’ until fatherhood.

      I’d bet most childless females regret not becoming mothers in their later years. Even the most hardened career women lament that I reckon.

      Re the trash parents example – check out the comedy movie “idiocracy” very good example of what I’m outlining above.

      The more kids you have ( the bigger litter) the more odds some will have the mix of genes to be successful. No kids = no future success at all

    9. “But are you going to be the next Isaac Newton?”

      Of course not, that wasn’t the point. The point was that there are other ways to pursue “establishing a legacy”. You can even go publish a book on a topic that you’re knowledgeable about and people will be far more likely to remember your name in the future. As this article itself points out, how many people out there even know the names of their great grandparents? (Although that puts aside the point of whether “establishing a legacy” is something even worth bothering with)

      For the record, I’ve already done something like this for a niche community I care about. I’m not going to specify what it is or for what community, because I don’t wish to dox myself. lol.

      “The more kids you have ( the bigger litter) the more odds some will have the mix of genes to be successful. No kids = no future success at all”

      – You either didn’t watch or completely ignored the video that I linked at the end of my first response to you as food for thought. Rolling the dice on other people’s lives in hopes that a random combination down the line will result in a successful combination isn’t everybody’s definition of “success.” That’s what every average dumdum is doing and look where it got our current society.

      Do you think these people should be encouraged to “keep reproducing in hopes that one day, they spawn some random genius who manages to get out of the rut down the line at some point in the distant future”?

    10. @ Maou

      Didn’t ignore – presumed it was something else and set aside to watch later and see now it’s the same movie I mentioned also 🤦🏻‍♂️ I’ll watch fully later and comment back

      I would also edit and expand my earlier comment to ;

      “Have kids *and be the most available and best dad you can be * I say!”

      The legacy you speak of is not a genetic legacy.
      Different things entirely. That legacy can’t fully be appreciated by the author / creator or his bloodline children if none exist.

      A guy may write a fantastic book – but really .. so what?
      He may not be around to see its success or reap the benefits of it.
      Many a great book or creative work we’re not appreciated in the time they were written and release. Only posthumously in later eras the genius was recognised. Etc

      He makes a name for himself..
      Maybe His work is held in high regard In his short lifetime .. maybe not , either way he dies and he is no longer around to appreciate the bigger celebration of his works.

    11. Now you are engaging in completely defeatist thinking. Why not tell us about the heat death of the universe, which is often presented as a “fact” even though it is at best a hypothesis and at worst cabalistic bullshit. The human race improves one step at a time and you can contribute in your own little way even if your actions may not reverberate throughout the ages.

    12. @Sleazy

      “The human race improves one step at a time and you can contribute in your own little way even if your actions may not reverberate throughout the ages.”

      So you are saying – don’t have kids , contribute in a little way to the improvement of the human race instead ..(?)
      Ok. That’s your choice.
      It’s a big gamble is all. And that choice misses out on one of the miracles of life .
      Hard for me to describe the feelings involved of looking into my sons eyes and knowing I will continue on in some new form into the future. Or the sense to protect, guide him and the responsibilities involved.
      It’s a feeling that cannot be quantified really tbh. It’s a primal thing.

      Just watching him run through sprinklers in the park today for the first time , watching his fascination with the rotating water jet and how he could manipulate it is magic stuff to me. Seeing his little cogs turning and his experiments with it and changing the direction of the spray with his feet and hands etc.
      His delight with it etc . It’s just so simple and pure .
      It’s like movie stuff .. and priceless.

      The comments above made me think of stuff I’ve heard women say re men and kids. Stuff like
      “ no man is ready to be a dad / no man really ‘plans’ to have kids” or some such comments,

      It’s kinda true. Majority of men, including myself ( child 1 was unplanned) put it on the long finger or don’t really have the desire due to perceived hassle and cost of them. (Why would I ?my life was pretty sweet childless.)

      But after I had them I was very happy I did and totally got it. Hard to explain.

      An older dad dude I knew pre kids used to say fo me “ it’ll change you completely , you’ll be a new person after it yada yada ..” and I’d roll my eyes at him “yeah yeah sure thing granddad”

      But he was right . Just hard to explain or quantify it .

      If other things give a guys life more meaning so be it. But hard to say if that’s worth it in the long run, due to reasons I gave above. There’s more “deeper meanings “ to having kids in my mind,
      More Mother Nature shit.

      But if a bloke can save the planet vs having kids then sure go for it. Dunno why he couldn’t do both tbh myself. That’d be the ideal.

    13. Where did I say that you should not have kids? That is completely up to you but ideally, every father should try to help their children so that they can do a little bit better than themselves. Also, it seems you are setting up a false dichotomy. Isaac Newton had no children, Fyodor Dostoevsky had four. You will find plenty of accomplished men who had children as well as plenty of men who did not amount to anything and arguably were a net negative on society who also had children.

    14. @Maou

      That Idiocracy clip demonstrates my point.
      Bear in mind it is a sci-fi comedy Re the proposed future result.

      Look at high IQ Trevor & Carol Vs white trash Clevon & Trish.
      Bottom line is – who is winning at the’ Game Of Life’ in that example? The white trash. They survive and thrive. And odds are some of their progeny will be successful , by some means.

      There has always been dummies reproducing .
      And wether you or I encourage or not, that will continue to happen.

      Re the other video you posted,
      The world hit over-population decades ago.
      That’s the reason the world is fucked and economies are all over the place etc etc. plus immigration crisis in so many places.

      Debateable when exactly that happened re the over-pop, or what the most efficient population ought to be on the planet,

      (When was the golden era? 60-70s perhaps)
      Overpopulation is not really due to trash having more kids. It’s quality of life and advancements in health and tech since 1950s onwards.

      There used to be natural population balancing events that happened in the world . Wars , natural disasters , disease etc, but the human race is too tech advanced now and is handling these natural events and beating them quickly.

      I thought Covid was the next major one when it hit ,but that has only trimmed 7M off the population . And mainly the oldies as most kids immune etc.

      Spanish flu of 1918 killed off somewhere between 17-100million people. (Estimated)
      50million is a common figure.
      It affected 1/3rd of the global population back then.

      Maybe they got the Vaxx out too quick for this one.(!)
      Shoulda let it go on untreated in certain countries perhaps.

      WW1 =15 million deaths
      WW2 =75 million deaths

      Etc etc,
      So there are no natural or man-made balancing events any more, that’s the real cause.

    15. “Ok. That’s your choice.”
      – That’s really the fundamental message I was trying to get to you. There is more than one way to do your share of good in the world. Find what is appropriate for you. Someone could have the potential to be an absolutely great scientist, but a completely terrible father material.

      “it’ll change you completely , you’ll be a new person after it yada yada”

      I do not doubt that this is true. Whether or not it will change you for the BETTER though, is completely up in the air. Here’s a collection of parental regret stories:

      https://www.reddit.com/r/childfree/wiki/regret

      You talk about how it is a complete gamble to find your own way of bettering the world. Didn’t it occur to you that the same goes for having children? Both in how they could turn out (You’ve talked about this yourself when you addressed that parents’ ability to mold children is far from absolute. No genuine parent ever expects to raise a violent criminal, yet it happens all too often, etc.) and how YOU (the general “you”, not you specifically. congrats that you found happiness, but don’t assume this will be true of everyone if they take up parenthood. Not true. not even close.) would respond to it.

      “We don’t rise to the occasion, We fall back on our habits” (I believe the original saying was “We don’t rise to the occasion, We fall to the level of our training”. Both are excellent sayings.)

      Yes, its true that nobody is ever 100% ready to become a father/parent, but if you are an irresponsible and unsuccessful deadbeat as a single person, why on earth would you expect that to suddenly change when parenthood comes into the picture? Sure, there are incredibly rare (and that’s why stories like these end up in Hollywood movies, its completely unrealistic.) cases where that happens, but not only is it a gamble, but a completely irresponsible one because you are gambling not only with your own life, but an innocent one’s as well.

      I have witnessed way too many disastrous cases where people who had no absolutely no business becoming a parent chose to take up the mantle, only to make a mess of all parties’ lives in the process. Again, do you think the people in the video I shared eating “pagpag” should be encouraged to have more kids in their absolutely disastrous life circumstances? or be told they should do their utmost to better their life situation first? (and if they can’t do that? then maybe, just maybe, its better to not have children just to doom them to that kind of horrible life. of course, whether or not these people will even think of such considerations is another matter.)

      “But if a bloke can save the planet vs having kids then sure go for it. Dunno why he couldn’t do both tbh myself. That’d be the ideal.”

      – The same reason people can’t become a top %’er at everything they do. Time and Mental energy/resources are finite. Not to say that there’s a few who could do it (Alek’s talked about that there ARE women out there who can have BOTH a career and a family, but they tend to be very high IQ women. the average woman however, cannot have both) but most cannot. How common do you see people with absolutely stellar careers but can’t find quality time to spend with their children, for example?

    16. Even “very high-IQ” women make a compromise if they want to have children. Also, their careers are largely fake, propped up by DEI/ESG, which is slowly but surely going away. Tangentially related is that IQ tests have been politicized for over half a century. The politically correct take is that there are more men than women at both ends of the IQ spectrum. However, much more interesting is that modern IQ tests downplay if not completely avoid spatial as well as mechanical reasoning because women used to perform so poorly on them. Also, quantitative tests normally have a much lower ceiling than verbal ones, which is done so that tests can be “normalized”, meaning that men and women both average out at an IQ of 100 but this only happens because the tests not properly assess quantitative skills anymore. I have read that before these changes happened, female IQs were, ceteris paribus, about one standard deviation below male IQs, and that was for teenagers, i.e. they did not even take into account that women mature much sooner than men. I have no reason to doubt any of this. In fact, it fits nicely with my experiences of there being very few women and often zero in the most advanced STEM courses at university.

    17. @ Maou

      Where is that ‘pagpag’ video located.
      I seem to remember u may be a Pinoy guy?
      Is it the “favelas’ of Manilla ?
      I’ve been to Philippines on a 2 week trip.
      Manilla , cebu and another small island.
      Have some thoughts to share w u if it’s PP.
      Cheers CJ

    18. @ Maou

      Ok a google confirms it’s the slums of Manilla.
      Two things I’d say
      1. That’s an awful existence for those poor people.
      2. I’ll bet their kids give them the strength to live on each day – and they all hope their kids make it out of the slum and onto a better life.

      The problem on Manilla is clear to me. It’s one of the most overpopulated cities in the world, and also the most strongly catholic and old school catholic at that. When I was there 10 year ago there was a debate in the newspapers re the church still not giving the pinoys the all clear to use contraception. In 2012(!) . Unreal.

      So those poor people there probably think God & the Catholic Church. wants them to have more children

      I’m wondering what is the solution to this slum problem.

      Would it be
      (A) drop a series of Mark 77’s big bombs( ie 750lb napalm bombs) across all the slums in tandem and toast the area and inhabitants to ash . Thereby reducing the over population and clearing up the waste issues also.

      Or

      (B) bulldoze the slums , build cheap high-rise social housing and put inhabitants on $ weekly benefits to improve their quality of life etc?

      What do u think..

      A dichotomy for sure.. but what’s the answer to overpopulation? I don’t know tbh…

      What in your opinion would be option (c) or (d)?
      I don’t have any other ideas.

      And And edit – I now see from google that

      “Which City Has the Highest Population Density in the World? The city that has the highest population density in the world is Manila in the Philippines, which was found to have a population per square mile of 119,600.”
      So I was correct in my assumption. It’s a bigger problem.

    19. _____
      When I was there 10 year ago there was a debate in the newspapers re the church still not giving the pinoys the all clear to use contraception. In 2012(!) . Unreal.
      ____

      Indeed. I still vaguely remember the time when I was in elementary that our school made us march in opposition of the Reproductive Health Bill. Being a kid then, I had no idea what in the holy hell we were marching for. Part of what astounds me looking back is that the owners of that school are a family of the rich. (Not nouveau riche)

      Surely, they were educated about the problem. Did they make us march because they genuinely believed opposing what is a much needed cause in our country or was it all just a farce to look good to our ignorant public? (in hopes of inviting more customers/students into the school, etc.) I don’t know. Either way, now that I know what I know, it makes me sick looking back.

      “I’m wondering what is the solution to this slum problem.”
      – I’m afraid at this point, there is no easy (and you better forget about it being “politically correct”) answer to that question. See now why I’ve said elsewhere that the Philippines “might” be a good place to retire, but an absolutely terrible place to raise and school (especially that latter part, lol) your children in?

      “what’s the answer to overpopulation?”

      I don’t think there’s an easy answer to that question either. But I think what helps (though certainly doesn’t solve the problem in its entirety. not even close) is spreading awareness that there is a way of living outside of what the mainstream is pushing. Like what I was doing here right now. Parenting isn’t for everybody, and the more people are made aware of this (particularly in my country), the less children who are born in absolutely terrible circumstances raised by parents who couldn’t even raise a cactus correctly, the better.

    20. @Maou

      But re the slums – kids are what keep people going and living in those awful environs. Sex Education and church approved contraception would help for sure. But they all want to survive and thrive too. And their kids are their only chance to get out of the slum.

      I think it’s the Mark 77’s myself.
      Imagine being a “town planner “ or social/ civil engineer or manager (or whatever they are called) in the Philippines.. holy shit. What a job!

      I’ll post up a link to a funny meme I saw Re that and telephone pole wiring in Asia. It’s insane!

      And the church are happy for the Pop to keep growing , as more of the faithful for them.

      I remember seeing a bronze statue there (in Manilla) of some Spanish conqueror ‘founder’ dude with his sword and holding a big crucifix. He looked as tho he Just arrived off the boat in his conquistador garb to liberate’ the pinoys.
      ( ?name) I wondered regarding it do the pinoys hate the Spanish settlers and that period of their history? Probably.

      I went to the Mall Of Asia – it was insanely huge.
      With a hundred shops selling fake Ralph Lauren “Polo” gear. Haha. All the same stock each shop!

      The traffic in Manilla was unreal w all the crazy Jeepsters. And there were people sleeping rough on the street outside my hotel.
      I had to step over them . Very sad.

  4. @Maou:

    I’m sorry, but what “mainstream” messaging is encouraging people to have more children? Is it a Phillipines thing? Because I haven’t seen it anywhere, even for the rapefugee races (africans, moors and we can even include the pajeets there), though they certainly don’t encourage those to have fewer children either.

    OTOH, if a guy expects to find meaning in life by becoming the next Isaac Newton or Nikola Tesla, or to contribute even a 100th of that for humanity, he’s in for a rude awakening. Let’s not go too far: as accomplished and intelligent as Sleazy and Alek Novy are, their biggest contribution to humanity is probably the knowledge they share here, anonymously (since hot chicks are involved, I don’t think Alek’s business must be exactly groundbreaking stuff for mankind, hah).

    1. @ Manuel
      I would tend to agree with all of that.
      Have a couple kids and be the best dad you can be I’d say. There is no perfect parenting. Doesn’t exist. They are their own little people from the get go. Some will have a natural drive or be natural A-types, others will not. Can’t predict as it’s all down to gene mix in utero and a lucky dip tbh.

      Parenting skills should be taught to boys in school imo.
      And seduction skills also tbh that’d be great.
      I’d be happy to have a crack at that job 😎

      Girls learn parenting skills as they have a natural interest in children from 1-2 years old. Playing ‘mummies and daddies’ with their lil Dollies. Girls also map out their family tree and relations from about 3 yo, their grandparents. aunties, uncles , cousins etc etc and use these in their dramatic play very early. Quite amazing.

      My son hasn’t a clue of these things at 3 .
      He just wants to punch me in the balls /head , wrestle me, run around and play cars and smash his toys into one another (kaboom) etc etc very different the sexes and so obvious in children the different developments and preferences.

      Girls read faces and their environment from birth, boys do not. (For the majority) That’s why by teenager years girls have 10x ability to decipher body language emotional states, “vibe” and read social situations wayyy more accurately than equal age boys.

      The most common things I’ve heard chicks say about men is “men are so dumb” – ie they can’t read social situations , subtext of a convo or pickup signals from women that women consider obvious signs to them .

      The book “The chemistry between us” is a fantastic guide for the differences between the sexes imo. A must -read imo for real understanding at the brain and biology level.
      It covers all aspects very well. Including mating re desire ,lust and all the hormones and ‘chemicals’ involved. Amazing stuff.

    2. In the late 90s and early 00s there was a fair amount of talk here from politicians about the need to have more children, as they noticed that the demographics were going to make the pension system unsustainable in the long run, and they wanted more taxpayers.

      That’s mostly disappeared now, though. Can’t really remember the last time I heard something like that.

    3. @Manuel

      Its called The Lifescript™. Its part of the Bluepill.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTkp9UqVVHs

      Plenty of people get married, have kids, subscribe unquestioningly to their family religion, work their whole life at a 9-5 job for the profit of a company that ultimate doesn’t care about them, etc. because they don’t even know there is an alternative way to live.

      https://blog.aaronsleazy.com/index.php/2017/02/12/featured-reader-comment-for-guys-complaining-about-negativity-by-alek-novy/

      As Alek has talked about here. its easy for the regulars on this blog to take for granted just how bluepilled the average person is. A lot of the stuff we’ve been made aware of, we take for granted.

      There is most definitely social pressure (that’s what I mean by “the mainstream”) to follow the lifescript. Albeit not as much as back then.

      https://www.youtube.com/shorts/w6p_RzFITU4

      Have you never experienced this from your friends and family? the whole pressuring to get married and have kids thing.

    4. @Maou:

      As I said, there’s no such encouragement in the White West. The “Brown” West, i.e. Latin America, is following the same pattern, because all which the United States does, we copy, the bad and the worse. Must be different for Pinoys.

      And yes, I’ve had some slight family pressure to marry, but nowhere to the amount of pressure I’m feeling from my own biological urges, hah.

      It’s kind of the same with religion: we the Sleazy Blog regulars are rational and enlightened enough to know that you can certainly lead a virtuous life without believing in God and without having kids. But it’s unnatural, unrewarding for the most part, and a curse that comes with having an above average IQ and being discerning enough to despise normie thinking. I, for one, would like my faith back, and a couple of kids please.

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