We got some good news recently: one of our former regulars, Lisbon, reappeared and told us that he got a girlfriend. Congratulations, bro! This is significant because he had been telling us for many months that he’s an “incel” and can’t get laid to save his life. He somehow had drunk sluts in clubs making out with him. Yet, he could not connect the dots. We had told him that his situation is not nearly as hopeless as he thinks and that he needs to go for girls who are into guys who look dangerous. For context, Lisbon looks like a (genuine) killer. You’d probably cross the street if you saw him coming your way. No offense, dude! That’s just how it is. It’s a strenght, and you need to tailor your game accordingly.
If you look like a killer, i.e. very masculine and like a guy you just don’t want to fuck with, you need to act the way, too. You can’t look like a pitbull, yet carry your girlfriend’s handbag or tell her that it’s fine if she’s having sex with other guys because you don’t want to inhibit her spiritual growth or whatever other pretense she may use to justify her whoring. You need to act like a man! (Yup, Lisbon’s girlfriend wants to have sex with other men.)
Incongruence is where a lot of pickups go south because the initial assumption a girl makes is that you can get girls. She thinks your a confident dude. Well, she only thinks that you’re hot but because she doesn’t want to be shallow, she’ll b.s. about your personality if ask her why she finds you attractive. She would not smile at you, inviting you to approach her, if she thought you were some soyboy cuck. Instead, she thinks that you’re a man who has balls to go for what he wants. Then the dude hems and haws, can’t make eye contact, and makes a lame approach ten minutes later, when she has already lost interest.
She wants you to be confident, so act in a confident manner! This is doubly important if you look as if you kill other men for a living like Lisbon. She will only lose respect for you if you don’t set any boundaries. He told us that his girlfriend wants to fuck other dudes on the side. Can you imagine how incongruent your behavior must be if a woman says to a guy who could break her neck like a pencil that she intends to fuck other guys? It does not take much to deduce that this is what you get when you look like a killer, yet act like a pushover.
To illustrate my point, assuming you don’t know any thugs in real life, look up depictions of dangerous men on screen. The first example that came to my mind was Tuco Salamanca in Breaking Bad. He’s aggressive and has impulse control issues. If you’re around such a guy, you would really watch your behavior. The closest you come to dangerous guys in real life is probably when you go to a nightclub and say hi to the bouncer as you walk in. Look at those dudes! Would you fuck with them? You wouldn’t, so why would a girl?
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