I had a client recently who asked me for some career guidance. He was toying with the idea of reducing his hours so that he could have more time for chasing after women. For context, the guy is quite young, early to mid-20s, and has already made some impressive strides in his fields. In short, I told him to keep focusing on his job, for a variety of reasons. The details of his particular situation are not uninteresting, but you can learn more by looking at the general case, which is the question of whether you should do X or chase women.
Whenever you ask yourself if you should invest a significant amount of time, money, or effort just or the sole purpose of trying to get more women, you can safely drop those thoughts. Don’t bother! Instead, do what you want to do. Let me show you how this will turn out. A simple case is reducing your hours so that you can go out more often and bang a few more sluts. Well, in this case, you arguably lose a fair amount of income, which is probably much more than you would have to pay for a hooker. Then there is the issue of compounding effects. Particularly if you are early in your career, making a big push right out of the gate can accelerate your career path quite drastically. This means you’ll make more money, get more responsibility and possibly more status too. All of this means that you will be more attractive to women and find it easier to nail them. Granted, this could be the provider-variety of attraction, but a good-looking guy who enjoys some level of professional success can nonetheless do better than a similarly good-looking guy who is in a more precarious financial situation.
Not everything revolves around your job, though. So, let’s look at a few hobbies. Let’s say you are considering picking up a particular hobby just so that you can meet more women. This is, again, a bad idea. How would you feel if you had to suffer through a yoga class just so that you can chit chat with some ditzes before or after class? I used to teach yoga myself, and I can tell you that guys who visibly don’t enjoy yoga look really out of place. They tend to learn quickly and stay away. Thus, do what you want to do and see if there are ways of meeting more women as a side effect. One example is timing your workouts so that you can end when yoga class ends. If there is some thot smiling at you as she’s leaving yoga class, make your move right there.
The general issue is that if you fully focus on meeting women but you are not getting the results you want, your time will feel utterly wasted. This does not mean that you are the problem. You could decide to go to some social event like a meet-up, but not find any of the women attractive. If you only go there for the women, you’ll only kicked yourself afterwards. However, if you went there because you were interested in meeting some people with shared interests, you’ll like found the event to have been worth your time.
Among blue-pillers, the advice that love comes when you are not looking is commonly spread. Women get told that Mr. Perfect will show up the very moment she’ll get off Tyrone’s cock, just like Melvin is told that he shouldn’t despair that he’s still a virgin because eventually, albeit details are unspecified, he will meet a woman. Of course, this is bullshit. However, there is a deeper truth in it: if you relentlessly pursue your goals, chances are that you will put yourself in a position where women will find you more attractive, for instance because the sport you play leads to a toned body or the experience due to the extra hours you put in at work led to you getting a great job in a great location. In the worst case, all the money you’ll make will attract a bunch of gold-diggers, but from the perspective of a young man who would like to get laid more often, this is a luxury problem.
Did you enjoy this article? Excellent! Here are some further steps to consider:
1) If you want to read more from Aaron, check out his excellent books, the latest of which are Sleazy Stories II, Sleazy Stories III, and Meditation Without Bullshit.
2) Aaron is available for one-on-one consultation sessions if you want honest advice.
3) Donations for the upkeep of this site are highly welcome.
Agree wholeheartedly with your post- keep improving yourself and the women will follow.
However, you stated ” a good-looking guy who enjoys some level of professional success can nonetheless do better than a similarly good-looking guy who is in a more precarious financial situation.” When I graduated law school in the states and lucked into a pretty high paying prestigious big firm job, I figured my success rate was going to soar. After all, I did pretty well for myself as a broke undergraduate student and as a law student without a pot to piss in, I was going to rake it in now that I had money, right?
Instead I hit a fairly long dry spell for me where every girl I picked up, all I would get was some light foreplay and then receive her number with direction to call her for a date.
I finally figured out they had mentally moved me from fun guy (alpha fucks) to provider (beta bucks). I went back to just telling them I was a student or telemarketer and immediately the one night stands started back up again. Now, I was probably just a Chad lite back then so a 6’4″ model with a six pack probably stays in the alpha fucks category no matter how rich he gets, but for those on the bubble a good job can actually harm your closing rate.
likely chicks how find you as chad will sleep with your anyway ,but for chicks you aint chads suddenly gold diggers starts to come along.
good luck differentiating between them.
I’ve had a few such cases in my consultations. A common issue was that those guys put too much focus on their newly acquired status and that the women then consequently audition them for the provider role. This problem can be solved, though. You solved it yourself as well.