Meeting Women

The “Who are you?” Effect

Aaron "Sleazy" Elias

n one of the recent Open Threads, GoodLookingAndSleazy left a comment that questioned the validity of game:

Former porn star Jenna Jameson told Howard Stern how she made out with Bruce Willis at an LA club one night. He just came up to her, grabbed her and kissed her. Then he took off. She loved every minute of it. Howard actually pondered how he could pull that off. She said, “he had game.”

As we all know, “game” as it was promoted by the PUA crowd, does not work. What works, though, is having looks, status, and money. Bruce Willis, in particular at the height of his career, had it all.

There is another interesting part in the quote above. Remember Donald Trump casually stating (not boasting!) that he can just grab women by the pussy as he’s a billionaire and TV star. In the anecdote above, Bruce Willis just grabbed Jenna Jameson and made out with her. Given that Jenna Jameson was the biggest star in the porn business back then, I’d say that this doesn’t indicate good judgment on behalf of Bruce Willis, but that’s a separate issue.

I’m obviously nowhere near Bruce Willis and Donald Trump in terms of real-world success. Yet, I’ve quite frequently just grabbed chicks in clubs and made out with them right away and some of those interactions led to incredibly quick pulls that ended in a bathroom stall minutes later. To pull this off, a woman has to be both horny and find you quite attractive. Oh, and she better be a bit of a slut, too. A few times in those situations, I had chicks stop me. Then the interaction took a turn towards the somewhat bizarre. They would then ask me questions like,

  • “Who are you?”
  • “Are you, like, an actor or something?”
  • “You’re really rich, right?”

I recalled those responses after reading that Bruce Willis anecdote but I didn’t think much of them back then. Now those reactions make a lot more sense to me. Those women weren’t fully into me but they assumed that I was acting this way because of some external reason. This was the only explanation that was plausible to them so they wanted to find out what the missing piece of information was. Also, those reactions imply that these women have been picked up by such men before.

There are women who are overeager to sleep with men of high status. It’s quite bizarre at times. Women literally line up outside band busses after a gig. When the band shows up, those dudes just point their finger at some chicks and they follow them into the bus. Obviously, if you’re playing in some band and you have chicks literally throwing themselves at you, your behavior is likely to change significantly. In London, I once overheard some slut offering a BJ to a dude who had a backstage pass at a concert. She asked if she could get his backstage pass. The dude laughed in response, and the chick then said, “I can blow you if you want”. She didn’t get the backstage pass, probably because they had enough chicks in the backstage area already who did anything for free.

None of what I wrote vindicates PUA bullshit along the lines of “just be confident, bro!” as you still need the element of physical attraction. If she’s not attracted to you at all, you can’t pull this off. However, if she is borderline attracted, you can run into the kind of situation I described. Also, I should mention that the encounters I described mostly fizzled out, primarily because it’s a bit anti-climactic to a woman if she expects you to be at least moderately famous but you’re not.

Did you enjoy this article? Great! Here are some further steps to consider:
1) If you want to read more from Aaron, check out his excellent books, the latest of which are Sleazy Stories II, Sleazy Stories III, and Meditation Without Bullshit.
2) Aaron is available for one-on-one consultation sessions if you want honest advice.
3) Donations for the upkeep of this site are highly welcome.

14 thoughts on “The “Who are you?” Effect”

  1. I used to listen to Howard Stern a lot back then and watch his show on the E channel. When Jameson told that story Howard seemed intrigued. I look back and laugh at it now. Howard had money and status but not the looks. Thus, he couldn’t pull off what Bruce could. I think Howard’s lack of physical attractiveness still bothers him to this day.

    He always fell back on his “personality” and “sense of humor.”. A lot of radio guys think like this. Tom Lykus, Adam Corolla, and Mikey’s defunct morning show (San Diego) come immediately to mind. There is a reason why they are on the radio instead of the big screen. They rationalize that girls want to fuck them because they are funny and entertaining, not for their money and fame. And at the end of the day they are still jealous of good looking men, regardless of their money and status. I could tell in Howard’s comments about it. He always wanted validation from female quests. Looking back I wish I never followed him or Adam or Lykus. They perpetuated PUA myths.

    Reply

    1. I can rememeber on the old mASF forum when some moron posted a picture of Howard Stern and his attractive wife, as if that was supposed to refute the importance of LMS. It amazes me how much delusional behavior I witnessed back then.

    2. Once I had figured out the PUA myths for myself there were still a few guys who I couldn’t explain away. One of the biggest proponents of the PUA myth for me was Patrice O’neal. This obese black guy was apparently the king of pussy.

      I don’t know how he pulled it off. He was a little famous and a little rich but nothing more.
      And he tried to always tell the truth and yet he still said things like “women are attracted to different things than we are”.

    3. His rate of success is nothing like guys like Cristiano Ronaldo (used to play Barcelona), Adam Levine (lead singer of Maroon 5), or Leonardo di Caprio (famous actor).

    4. Patrice was 6 ft 5 in (1.96 m). He also was in a LTR with a chick how had a daughter from another dude.

      When he said they were attracted to other stuff, that included money. O’neal was a provider through and through. But he let chicks know early and often that he expect sex in return.

    5. “Patrice was 6 ft 5 in (1.96 m). He also was in a LTR with a chick how had a daughter from another dude.”
      That explains a lot, he was on par with Mystery at that height.

      Nothing mysterious!

    1. When it comes to handling girlfriends of my friends, my number 1 rule is never let myself be alone with any of them. I respect my friends and I don’t want to leave any room for doubt.

    2. Not a good equivelent comparison tho.

      When a celebrity randomly walks up to a chick, he’s offering her “celebrity dick for a night”, he’s not offering her commitment or a relationship.

      If both the male model and ronaldo were pursuing her and courting her for a relationship, then that’d be a more fair comparison.

  3. Her Lady must have built a stronghold to resist the assault of Mr. Cristiano Ronaldo, and hold him at bay until your model friend came to rescue her.

    I heard Hispanic women are more loyal to Western women. I read this from Sleazy’s forum. Don’t know how true is this!

    Reply

    1. We’d need a proper study, but I have a hunch that Western women are the least loyal of all.

  4. Hi Aaron,
    This reminds me of some of my own experiences with trying out “authority/power frames” in pickups and getting quick one night stands as a result.
    It also echoes a “rule” that old school pickup guru ‘Rick H’ used to espouse “ if you do anything with enough authority you will get away with it “ .I would tend to agree from what I’ve seen.
    Also I would disagree that all “game as promoted by the PUA crowd doesn’t work .” There used to be a lot of good advice before RSD et al came on the scene and derailed it …ie pre 2006 there was better info available

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.