Gender Dynamics · Women

No, Women who Pick “Bad Boys” Don’t Have Low Self-Esteem

I recently overheard a blue-pilled cuck say that a chick he is pining for is in a relationship with a guy who treats her rather poorly because she has “low self-esteem”. That is complete bullshit. Of course, your garden-variety simp is quick to make excuses for the questionable behavior of a woman, even more so when he believes that the “poor girl” in question will eventually pick him if he’s as nice as possible to her. There is one big problem with that kind of reasoning: Women choose their partners. It is not the case that suddenly some harmless schmuck turns into a wifebeater. No, instead women who end up in a relationship with an abusive partner deliberately chose them. Clearly, women can just walk away. They can also say no to all the schmucks that approach them. Yet, once some thug shows up who makes their gina tingle, they jump on that opportunity, quite literally, as soon as they can.

On that note, I remember a piece of David DeAngelo’s bullshit from years ago. I recall him saying that women don’t like “nice guys” because they can’t trust them. According to his reasoning, a nice guy is only nice until he blows a gasket. Consequently, every nice guy is a shithead in disguise. Man, that kind of psychology is dumb beyond belief. Instead, (some) women don’t like nice guys because they don’t make their ginas tingle. Yet, once those women hit the wall, they will want a safe choice they feel they can control. At that point a nice guy is a prime choice. It seems that David DeAngelo, in his endless cluelessness, was not aware of this, just like he was not aware of a whole lot when it comes to real-life dating and mating.

Do “good girls” end up with assholes, or is it instead the case that those women are only interested in assholes? It’s the latter. Consequently, you should never ever interfere if you see a woman getting berated by her abusive boyfriend in public. She picked that guy, and she likes being treated like shit. View it this way: Let’s say your boss is a complete dick. He pays below market rate. The work isn’t interesting, and you don’t get to knock off before 8 p.m. Furthermore, you have job offers from at least five other companies who you know would treat you better on all fronts. You can start right now. There’s even a fat signing bonus you can claim. Yet, you don’t take any of the offers. Why don’t you? Well, clearly it’s because you like being abused. Otherwise, you’d have left long ago. With women who don’t leave their abusive partners, it’s the same. They could easily leave. There is an army of simps willing to take them, and if that’s not an option, for whatever reason, there is a whole support industry with women’s shelters. Heck, she could even murder her abuser and only get a slap on the wrist for it. The options are there. However, because she does not take any of them, she must enjoy her misery deep down.

On a somewhat more light-hearted note, at least in comparison, think of women who complain about only getting pumped and dumped. Again, the issue is that those women pick such guys willingly. Don’t tell me that Stacy wasn’t aware that Chad, who fucked her in the bathroom stall two minutes after saying “hi” to her, may not make for a stable boyfriend. Such women are aware of what they are getting into. However, they choose to ignore future consequences of their actions in the present, which is largely due to almost non-existent impulse control. Some women are more than willing to engage in risky sexual behavior, and they do it because that is what they want to do. Don’t pity them. If you are pining for a woman who tells you about all the “assholes” who are gone the next day, she is only using you for the attention you provide.

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16 thoughts on “No, Women who Pick “Bad Boys” Don’t Have Low Self-Esteem

  1. I think there are exceptions. Like a gal might meet a guy who seems normal and then at some point , he does a 180 and she feels trapped.

    But yes, a lot of the time, a girl is w a douschebag because she chose him. Common denominator in all ur failed relationships is you.

    1. Once I asked a psychologist friend why so many women have such a hard time getting out of abusive relationships, the answer was that the abusive men tend to manipulate them over time, progressively cutting the woman off from her social circle until she is socially isolated with him. So once she sees past the initial deception and realizes the true nature of the relationship its too late to jump ship (or rather she feels its too late because she has no support network beyond him).

      Not sure to which percentage of cases that applies. Note that this is regarding abusive LTRs, so the principles at work may not be the same. Even if the girl wanted to choose carefully, the guy may decieve her to make her believe he is LTR material? But dont take my word for it, Im just speculating out loud here.

  2. Women who choose bad boys are either low quality women or they don’t understand their worth. No high value woman who knows she deserves to be treated with respect is going to put up with assholes or bad boys.

    1. What’s your definition of a high value woman? In my experience they simply screw around with badboy’s when they are young. Complain about it to their friendzoned beta orbiters. And only wise up when she’s already lost most of her value late twenties, early thirties. Women are like cars. The moment you take them out for their first ride they lose a huge portion of their value already. Every mile after that takes even more value away. After a few rides they have lost their new leather seat smell. A few rides after that it will have a few scratches and maybe make a rattling sound in it’s gear. So what’s a high value woman? One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. But she will never get her showroom value back after chad took her for a spin. A high value woman doesn’t stick around after chad abused her on his testdrive? How many chad’s can testdrive her before we consider her a used car? Or worse “public transport”. Most don’t even make it into the showroom without damage these days.

    2. It’s amazing to me how some people will call women trophy wife’s. While she already has a history as a sugar baby, abortion and a cocaine rehab. It seems like a participation trophy to me. It’s not my definition of a winner. So what’s the definition of a high value woman? It use to be a beautiful well-behaved young virgin girl from a respectable family. Today it seems “not fat” and “not crazy” will be enough to call her high value. High value in comparison to what? The fat slob with the blue hair, tattoo and nose ring? The XXL “super model” leading the body positive movement? The club hoes rubbing against me in the club? The Harvard student that annoys men in five languages? Or the cocaine rehab trophy wife? Men are starting at bottom value when they are young. They gain value with their accomplishments. Women start at top value. They only get worse with age and partner count. And with all the stupid shit they do these days. So high value is mostly about the stuff she didn’t do.

  3. Agreed on all points.

    Now, the really relevant question is WHY do some people want to be abused?

    I know the answer. But they don’t. Way too uncomfortable.

    1. They are just biologically driven to seek out the strongest badass. Girls use to come watch me beating up other men at martial arts. It literally turned them on. Some even asked to have sex before taking a shower. In roman times wealthy women payed to have sex with gladiators. Most women have some rape or ravishing fantasy. They are just hungry for alpha badboy sperm. Ofspring from a guy like that has a better survival chance. They evolved to seek these guys out. In cavemen times, guys like this would come in and kill her male offspring and husband. He would take her husbands place. And she would breed with her former childs and husbands murder. Picking the biggest badass, means her offspring has better survival chances. And she’s better protected against other aggressive males. It’s not rational. It’s hormonal. Strong violent men turn them on. It’s just primitive biological programming. That’s all.

    2. There’s a fundamental difference between choosing the strongest dude and having a desire to be abused.
      I support your evolution-based logic. It does not explain desire to be abused though.

      People want to be abused because they feel they deserve it because they feel guilty. And guilt is the driver of self destructive behaviour. Love and hate for the same person (usually a close family member during childhood) causes guilt.
      And since nowadays parents are a very incompetent bunch of idiots and the government has provided a legal environment that literally incentivizes divorce, we have ended up with a very high share single parent households. And that fucks up kids so bad, they hate their fathers so much because they “buggered off” yet they love them and then they feel guilty for this conflict. So they end up doing destructive shit to punish themselves for the crime of hating their father.
      I say father specifically because custody pretty much always goes to the mother.
      There you have it. Most people are fucked up.
      It makes sense for a woman (evolutionary speaking) to seek out the biggest badass – fully agree with you here. But that does not imply to look for a guy who’ll hurt her.
      Imagine you’d sterilize all children who have been raised in a single parent household and you remove financial incentives for women to seek divorce. In a few generations you’ll have less people in the world who’ll actively look to abuse themselves and do self-destructive shit. Crime will go down, whoring will go down, peace will come. Restore the family unit, restore society.

  4. @Neutralrandomthoughts: Just stopping the mass redistribution of resources would be enough. Not just in divorce. But also welfare, child support, women’s education, healthcare, all redistribution of resources. Natural selection does the rest. Just let those who can’t take care of themselves and their children die. Forced sterilizing would only give the government more power. It’s mostly government power that’s causing the problem. We have governments that believe citizens are their property. And therefore they have rights on their laber and resources. Instead of a government that’s there to serve the people in the areas that need a collective effort. So giving government more power over people’s bodies is probably only going to make them more arrogant. And since they hate the white middle class. They are more likely to sterilise those people. Better to break down the government and start from scratch. This will stop all redistribution in one blow.

    1. @Neutralrandomthoughts: Looking at the state of corruption in the Western world. I don’t think reform will work. War is inevitable. It needs to be burned down and rebuild in total. All government institutions and courts. Start over with a new constitution and take it from there. But first there will be slaughter as the world has never seen before. It’s going to be ugly. And it might take a few generations. I don’t think Alibaba and his 40 million migrants will leave Europe willingly. It might take a wile before they are fought out. Last muslim invasion of Europe lasted 700 years. Women will submit to the men who win the coming war. They will love the men who were the best in slaughtering the others. It doesn’t matter who that will be. The white dude or the migrants. Left or right. They will love whoever wins.

    2. “It needs to be burned down and rebuild in total”

      Yeah but that’s just a pipe dream because there’s no guarantee the the same shit won’t be built again.
      If history has taught us anything it’s that humans tend to repeat the same mistakes and they are very bad at making longterm positive choices by accepting short term pain, especially in situations where scale comes into play aka big numbers like society construction.
      Some fucker will always scream “we need someone to take care of this” instead of “lemme take care of this shit”. And bang there you have it. Government is born.

      Look at the redistribution shit the Soviet Union pulled off. How long is that ago? 30 years? Not even 30 years ago socialism failed big time. Yet, what do we have nowadays? Punks like Bernie Sanders and unbelievably stupid cunts like Ocasio Cortez who sell the same concept. Do they know it doesn’t work, and do they plan on enriching themselves? Maybe, but it doesn’t matter, because people fucking vote for these lunatics, i.e. people freakin buy their shit. There is no right way to do socialism.
      So yeah, kick em out, shoot em, gas em, whatever… get rid of the muzzies and the welfare state that supports them. But they are just symptoms. My question is “how do you prevent people from from falling for the free-shit-narrative again?”
      It’s like humans as a collective are stuck at this stage and can’t go on to the next and they have to re-do this level multiple times.

    3. it will just happen again , good example,with soviet vs EU.
      the problem is there is just too many low iq people on the planet who makes this situation possible.
      more contribution should translate to also more influence(it is not).
      those dumb ass people will make this systemic disease possible, when government go broke and population go down it will become better only for it repeat again when the situation is good enough.

  5. (there’s no guarantee the the same shit won’t be built again.)
    The struggle for freedom and survival will never stop. War and suffering will never end. It’s the only guarantee we have. This is all part of human nature. It will never end. That doesn’t mean we should give up. If you want to be free, you’ll have to fight for it. If you want to live, you’ll have to fight for it. The Western world has a choice to make. Dominate the world, or being dominated. The struggle is never going to end. There will never be a lasting peace. Peace is just a pause between fights. Either you kill your enemies, or they’ll kill you. Makes things simple for me. All the moral bs is exactly that. It’s just bullshit people like to believe. In the end there’s only one law. The law of the jungle. Eat or be eaten. Fuck or be fucked.

  6. Aaron,
    1. What is it about these guys that women love about from the very beginning they meet? There’s no shortage of articles on the internet that argues women are driven to seek these types of guys cause somehow they demonstrate qualities that a quality does not possess and are absent in a quality guy.

    2. What causes these women to over-look a quality guy, and choose these abusive partners (bad boy)?

    3. Is the quality guy not doing something that is that the bad boy is that is increasing her attraction to him (bad boy)?

    1. Are you sure you are a “quality guy”? Quality guys normally don’t lament that girls overlook them.

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