I just came across a comment left by a reader about five years ago (!) on my old blog, which I think deserves further attention, as it very succinctly captures why some guys don’t get laid:
Alek [Novy] brought up a very important point in the other thread: if your lifestyle is lacking to the point where you’re entirely celibate, you have bigger problems to worry about than getting laid. You’re not taking care of yourself and your own (financial, social, physical) well-being on a basic level. The lack of pussy is just a symptom of much, much larger issues.
I think the real tragedy of the “community” is that it makes dudes with serious issues KEEP those problems unresolved. I agree with the point of this post, and with Alek’s comments here, but it’s a goddamn atrocity that “this will get you laid” is the only message that men in this niche will listen to.
How about “this will make you fundamentally less miserable with your life and yourself?”
I think it is hard to disagree with this comment, so yes, that is a pretty accurate statement i guess.
However, to sum all problems of guys under this premise is a bit of an oversimplification. I am a “high iq guy” which is probably average attractive. That gives me a couple of challenges:
– While the iq of women and men has the same average, the variance is way higher in men – the dumbest people i know are all men, but the smartest are also all men. The supply of women with the combination of smart + beautiful is pretty low, the demand is way higher.
– I get bored talking to low iq people really quickly. To talk to a hot but stupid chick for a couple of hours with the pure intention of getting laid is brutal for me – i really wonder how guys can do this.
– while “average” women based on hotness are not hard to get, having average sex with an average attractive girl is not that exciting for me, i would prefer masturbation
– i once had a very attractive and very smart girlfriend – guess where she worked? Right, at an investment bank. The number of guys that hit on on her constantly was insane. And no, they weren´t all “rich but short and ugly” – there are guys in this world who make $500k – 1m+x per year and are attractive at the same time. The competition was brutal.
So yes, in theory dating is not that difficult, but i you are in a spot where the supply and demand curves are totally asynchronous, it can still be quite a challenge.
Look into myers briggs – I get bored to tears talking with Mensa member S (sensing) woman.
Some tips that help me with retards called women
1. Alcohol (when talking with new women (works online too!) it only works with new women – it simulates your excitement to meet them. By the time you’re sober you probably have her nudes or have set up a date already. It is highly NON-recommended to use alcohol to talk with (online) with people who don’t PM you first. I used it successfully to get new dates or reconcile with people I didn’t talk for years (who were not in my friend list on facebook)
2. NoFap – this thing will make your IQ lower. You will be excited to talk about ariana grande with stupid chick – then you f*** her and get your sanity back
By now I think we all agree that the vast majority of guys in the PUA scene would benefit a lot from professional help (read: go to a psychiatrist), instead of mentally jerking off to RSD lifestyle advice. I speak from experience.
And most of the PUA audience lacks a father figure, which is to a large extent responsible for their issues. Again, I speak from experience.
> and most of the PUA audience lacks a father figure
That´s a quite interesting observation. Care to elaborate a bit with an example?
Short version:
Good at picking up chicks = being good with people + being aware of the man-woman-dynamic.
A good father leads by example (playing thr dynamic with the mother) and you have a better base to begin with.
Look at today’s men and ask yourself how good they can be at setting a relevant standard.
Makes sense?
I can’t believe 2012 was that long ago as five years ago! It feels like it was yesterday, with all the memories I had! Time seems to be flying faster and faster!
Anyway there is a subreddit on reddit.com called the “red pill subreddit”, or reddit.com/redpill, that’s become controversible but it seems to be growing. It espouses the same “game and be alpha bullshit” and ” go lift and most girl problems will be solved” shtick as the rest of the manosphere. They have a side bar on the sub Reddit that is mandatory reading, and it cites lots of PUA sources and Robert Greene books and mental masturbation from Rollo Tomassys blog.
Everyone here should check it out:
Reddit.com/r/red pill
Whenever i read the subreddit, I feel like smashing my computer screen and slapping the shit out of those morons circle jirking common sense or game/evo psych garbage constantly.
I am going through a very sour and difficult point in my life right now with a lack of pussy and life success, and it makes me really mad to read places like the sub reddit.
It’s deceptive and gives false hope and false ideas, and a vast majority of men that are down on life, are basically being mis led and brain washed or deceived and given a false sense of security by garbage on subreddits like those. Just like Roosh and his idiot followers or the various PAY companies
They are going to be sorely disappointed and hurt when they realize none of the shit on places like that actually deosnt work, is common sense info, and not really helpful to their situation at all.
This place needs to be critiqued and analyzed, because it’s becoming big and popular like the manosphere. And it’s going to disappoint anf anger the vast majority of men that end up there.
I wouldn’t bash redpill (esp illuminatus comments) so quickly. While they promise you too much, and while they wont make you better with women, I am perfectly sure they will teach you about some mistakes that lost you women that were already into you
I will admit there are occasional helpful and original stuff posted on there, but it’s drowned by the whole circle jerking none-sense that goes on there constantly.
reddit.com/redpill It’s just a place where people off different corners off the manosphere talk. PUA’s, MRA’s, MGTOW and everybody else who has some interest in redpill knowledge. I wouldn’t worry about it to much. Most men know the typical pua stuff doesn’t work. If you’re doing bad you should focus on yourself. When you do better the women problem solves it self. If you really want to have sex with a woman you can always use a escort to get the poison out. It’s cheaper than a girlfriend and much cheaper than a divorce. Or maybe pump and dump a single mother if you’re really desperate. Try to find something that you like to do and will improve your self-esteem at the same time. Sports can be one thing to do. Dont try to fix everything at the same time. Just start investing in your self and your position will automatically improve over time. And never forget how women were ignoring you when you were down. This is women’s nature. They only care about what we can give them. You should do the same.
Reddit Red Pill is utterly infested with PUA thought. A good portion of posts are devoted to game and cold approach tactics. Useful advice on increasing your sexual market value gets diluted by a lot of psychobabble on game and frame. Many posters thoroughly buy into RSD or other charlatans, and questioning these ideas will get you a lot of hatemail.