We previously discussed the importance of hints at a woman being of good or bad character, e.g. her doing small favors for you or actively trying to please you, not necessarily restricted only to sex. Alas, the opposite also exists, meaning that some where women care little about your needs. I mentioned the example of constructing a pretense on a date at a coffee shop so that you can observe how entitled she feels towards spending your money. For instance, pretend that you need to urgently use the bathroom, hand her a relatively large amount of money, and tell her that you are having a cup of green tea, or black coffee, or some other simple beverage and that she can order whatever she likes. You will find that some women will really go to town, ordering the most expensive items on the menu and — why not? — cake as well as ice cream. To top it all off, she may then leave the change as a tip because there is nothing like being generous with other people’s money. If you have never seen twenty or fifty bucks disappear in a moment like that, you are in for a surprise.
Of course, the point of an exercise like the above is not to throw away your money. Instead, when you think you are serious about a woman, it is a good idea to assess the quality of her character, and an investment of 50 dollars is nothing if it saves you many tens or even hundreds of thousands of dollars down the line. After all, if she cannot constrain herself in the coffee shop, you can be quite certain that she will also have certain expectations when it comes to cars, vacations, or your home. For the sake of completeness, some women do indeed act admirably. Some simply order whatever you wanted for herself as well, which is arguably the best solution to this little challenge anyway. On top, it signals that she is willing to follow your lead, which is another good sign.
You should not laugh off when a woman just casually blows your money. By her doing so, she demonstrates that whatever you have is hers in her mind already, even if the two of you are not yet fucking. Some entitled women will even drag you down a shopping street, tell you that some ex-boyfriend “always” bought her whatever she wanted, and put pressure on you to buy her a dress or a pair of shoes, or whatever else she may want, and not just anytime but right effing now. Some women have finely honed routines that are designed to maximize psychological pressure on you. Just saying, “no” does the trick. She may very well throw a tantrum in public, but if this is not a sign for you to get out, then I wonder what is.
I think some women simply want to extract the most money they can from you, and as quickly as possible. They do not care about any long-term implications because she may date a few guys like you whom she uses for the same purpose. As soon as she is done with one guy, the next simp happily replaces him. You may have heard of guys who ended up taking luxury vacations with chicks they hardly knew, spending a few thousand dollars just to impress her — and then she just ghosts the guy. I never blew money on some chick for a vacation, but a few did indeed try to get free trips out of me. I recall one who remarked, upon learning that I studied in England, that she would like to go there and quickly laid out her plans for a trip, including what she would like to see and do.
There is also the trap of your socio-economic status. Back in the days I had a few friends from rather well-off families, and if you met women while you were out with them, some would just casually drop that it would be nice to go snowboarding for a weekend or spend a weekend in Rome or whatever may just tickle her fancy. Some of those guys would indeed casually blow money on trips, with our without a girl in tow. Here, the issue is that those guys often have little appreciation for money, so they may even be oblivious to a chick who weaseled her way into their social circle cheating them out of goods and services to the tune of several thousands bucks a pop. Yet, even if you are financially very comfortable I would recommend that you pay close attention to what she expects you to pay for her. Of course, for this calculation you also have to include everything she couches in the more appealing term, “us”. Sure, it may be nice “for us” to go on a romantic getaway to La Paz or Montana, for you US bros, or to Scotland or Venice for the EU crowd, but in the end you will foot the entire bill and you certainly would not have gone to those places on your own. Oh, and do not be so stupid as to tell yourself that her offering to pay for the rental car, or some other relatively trivial expense, means that she is contributing, too. One rich guy once told me about a chick he took to NYC for a long weekend, and praised her for once having paid for coffee, as this supposedly meant that she was willing to pay her share.
What particularly annoys me is when a woman spends your money and then shows no appreciation at all for what she bought. In the example above, the coffee shop test, the girl may order a piece of cake but only eat a tiny bit of it. Of course, she cannot eat too much (tee-hee!), but she still wants to blow your money. A girl did this to me once, i.e. buying a piece of cake, then taking off a corner of it with a spoon, eating it and proclaiming that it is “mmmmh, really good” but did not touch the rest. Some other chick insisted that we go for brunch, together with a few of her friends. I ended up spending about 50 euros for the two of us because it had to be a “nice place”, and then the bitch hardly ate anything. Bizarrely enough, she later on reprimanded me for getting a second serving, while she insisted that I now take her to a restaurant because she was still hungry. Obviously, for her this was much more about showing off to her friends or “being seen” or some other non-quantifiable nonsense.
Just like you may have little regard for a woman you only have sex with, and do not really care if she ghosts you after two weeks or four, so do some women care not at all about you either. They may even strategically use sex to maximize resource extraction, e.g. bang you and during pillow talk bring up the idea of a weekend trip, talking about some “nice hotel” they have read about. Only thanks to women do I know about “design hotels”, by the way, not that I ever paid for one. For them, you are simply some kind of ATM she keeps kicking until it stops spitting out money, and then she will be gone.
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The fast resource extraction strategy is easy enough to see through. Yet, there is also the slow strategy, and by this I am not referring to serious long-term relationships, even though some certainly have the same characteristics. Here, the woman does not go for your jugular right away. This means that she will not suggest a spontaneous trip or insist that you buy her an expensive dress one week after you met her. At first, she may even act in a matter more or less indistinguishable from any random fuck buddy, but then she will slowly reel you in, and pretend to be seriously interested in you. This likely only happens if she believes that there is serious money to be siphoned off, maybe because you just had to show off your mechanical Swiss watch or you could not keep your mouth shut and boasted about how much money you make, despite living in comparatively modest dwellings.
Women pursing the slow resource strategy will gradually ask for more. In particular, they seem to like to want to move in with you if you live in a nice, central location, but this does not necessarily mean that she is now your girlfriend. I heard a few stories of women banging some dude for a while, getting them to agree to move in, and within a few weeks, they change the nature of the relationship. She then no longer sleeps in your bed but instead says that she needs more time to “study”, or some other pretense. Of course she still really likes you, but, given circumstances, you surely understand that she would like to have her own room. I once heard of a guy who let a chick live rent-free with him for about one year. He worked on “fixing the relationship”, not realizing that she is taking him for a complete fool. Essentially, she banged him a few times and in exchange she was able to live rent-free for a year, and I do not think she paid for groceries either. My interpretation was that she was dating and banging other guy’s behind that dude’s back, looking for the next host to jump to, and using the location of the apartment for enhancing her social status.
A girl I was seriously dating tried something rather amusing. She said that it would be “romantic” if we had a shared bank account, and it would also show that I was “really serious” about her. I had a hard time not laughing in her face when she propose that, but for the sake of entertainment, I asked her to log into her bank account so that I knew what I was supposed to get into. It was the end of the month, and she had not gotten paid yet, but I was nonetheless surprised to see that she had less than the equivalent of 200 dollars in her bank account. In case you are not aware of this, if you join bank accounts, she can freely access all the money as it is legally hers as much as yours. There are countess cases where women empty out the joint account before filing for divorce, for instance. Indeed, some women think that you are a complete moron. Yet, experience seems to suggest that they are onto something here as plenty of men fall for all those crude tricks they play on them.
Fiscal emergencies of women are very often not real, by the way. If the woman you are dating tells you that she cannot buy food and therefore would like you to spend 50 bucks on groceries so that she can eat, you can be quite certain that she has blown the money on bullshit, most likely clothes or make-up, if her story is even true at all. Some women just habitually beg you for money even if they do not need it. I once heard a story about a guy who gave his chick money for drugs. She was pretty degenerate, and he also saw little wrong with it as he liked doing coke every once in a while. Well, it does not take much fantasy to realize that she got drugs for free by fucking her dealer, and simply pocketed the money. This happens in clubs all the time. Well, you may even get chicks approach you and offer to suck your dick in exchange for a line of coke. It really is a degenerate world out there, and if you support a woman’s degenerate habits you probably should not complain about their behavior.
The other day I heard about a female approach to resource extraction I was not familiar with. For context, some women trick men into knocking them up. They will tell you that they can’t really get pregnant or that nothing will happen or whatever other nonsense. The guy, in turn, is a moron and blows a load, and the chick gets to extract alimony and child support for 18 or more years. This happened to plenty of actors and doctors. While this requires deception, I recently learned about women who are very upfront about what they want. A friend of mine is doing phenomenally well; his after-tax income is about 8.000 Euros, which is a very high amount in Europe, and lives a lavish lifestyle. In recent months, he has been wondering if he should seriously date women instead of just having flings and one-night stands, so he singed up for a few dating sites, including some for more well-off people, and he has now come across a few women who have told him, within the first few dates, that they would like to marry him and have a family. I was quite flabbergasted. According to him, some of those women seemed to not even like him.
My explanation for the behavior just mentioned is that those women see this guy as a rare opportunity. He tells them that he is looking for something serious and is thinking about having children, and some of those women then completely drop all pretenses and tell him that they are available. I should point out that we are not talking about mail order brides here but instead of women who are desperately looking for a provider. A story he hears often, but possibly only in response to him telling them what he wants, is that they are “tired of dating around”, and now they want to settle. In reality, there is a good chance that they do a bit of research, figure out that the guy is loaded, which is easy to do as a LinkedIn profile is apparently a liability nowadays, and make their move.
In summary, I think that whenever a woman asks for money, no matter the amount and the circumstances, you should be really careful. Some really just prime you for spending large amounts of money by making you pay for small things first. In any case, ask yourself if the amount she is asking you to spend on her makes sense given the status of the relationship. Very often, you will find that it is not, in which case you hopefully make the right conclusions and treat very carefully.
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A friend of me married a Russian woman (average, so he didn’t even get a hot one), so that she could live in Austria with him.
A few years into the marriage, some bullshit happend, and it was quite obvious that she was cheating on him.
(he found a receipt of the-day-after-pill on her tablet, but of course she bought it for a friend, lol)
I told him to divorce her, but he didn’t want to do it, being the naive idiot that he is.
A few months later, he told me that she got pregnant. She told him that she is infertile, and he had unprotected sex with her. lol.
Now, they don’t live together anymore, and he has to pay ~25% of his income (child support scales with your income in Austria) to her for the next ~25 years in child support.
My friend has quite a good income, so this will probably amount to 500k or even more.
For 500k you can have ~2500 sessions with attractive escorts.
So he could have fucked a hot woman each day of the year, for around ~7 years straight.
Instead he choose to fuck one average woman a few times, and instead of it being hassle free, there was a lot of emotional pain and frustration involved as well.
The gullibility and stupidity of the average man is quite shocking, and I really wonder how we ever managed to build a civilization.
On the other side, this woman played her cards perfectly I would say. She now has a child, and some idiot has to pay for it and she doesn’t even need to have pity sex with him once in a while, or live together with him.
Aaron,
“…she will also have certain expectations when it comes to cars, vacations, or your home.”
1. I’m slightly confused here. In one hand, women by nature seek out men who have resources for long-term relationships. On the other hand, the women you discussed were interested in extracting resources either using the fast or slow method. Wouldn’t these two go hand-in-hand? So, what is a relationship supposed to look like then if extracting resources is a red-flag?
2. Is this exclusive to young women only or older women as well trying to extract resources if she’s able to?
“…if this is not a sign for you to get out, then I wonder what is.”
3. Unfortunately, I’ve met quite a few guys who only seem to learn the hard way. I knew a guy who got 3 DUI’s. He never seemed to learned from his first one.
“Oh, and do not be so stupid as to tell yourself that her offering to pay for the rental car, or some other relatively trivial expense, means that she is contributing, too.”
4. How much should a women contribute then?
5. Related to number four, should women pay for the first date? I say YES. I mean, women have more economic opportunity than ever before, and are making more money than guys are. It’s time for women to pay their fair share. The issue is that women have the luxury of going out on multiple dates with different men, while those men spend their hard earn money and she spends none. Yet, those men might not even get laid at all and it’s not guarantee.
1) In this model, women pursuing the fast resource-extraction strategy want the most as soon as possible while the others have a longer time horizon. With the former, I am thinking of women who make outrageous demands almost from the get-go, such as vacations, luxury handbags, and fancy clothes.
2) I think that this behavior is much more common among younger women. I have seen older women trying to pull this off and fail miserably. In fact, I think those old whores almost make you feel pity due to their delusion of thinking that they can compete with women ten years younger than them.
3) Yes, some guys seem to take a long time to learn their lessons.
4) She should not ask you to spend a lot of money. You will also notice that as soon as you ask her to contribute 1/2 or 1/3, or whatever seems appropriate based on her income, her enthusiasm for expensive vacations will wane noticeably. On top, she is likely to kick up a fuss and accuse you of being stingy, mean, or anything else she can think of.
5) I would say this depends. The classic rule is that the party who asks for a date pays. As you can see, this is feminist bullshit because men are expected to ask out the woman. My suggestion is to sidestep the issue by having cheap dates, which entails tea or coffee for both of you. Given the low cost of those beverages, I see no harm in paying for it as it is a trivial expense.
She should contribute either 50%, or proportionate to her income compared to your income; your choice. If she objects to paying anything. ask her what service she will perform in return; cleaning your home or BJ? If she’s offended and says she’s not your maid or prostitute, then you tell her that apparently she is a parasite. I mean it’s 2021 and we’re all equal now!
In Singapore, some pampered wives believe that their duty is to supervise the maid. Amusingly, some of the husbands divorce the wife and marry their maid instead. I am sure that there is not the slightest connection between both phenomena.