Among the many lies society tells young and impressionable men is that women have much more evolved social skills. In comparison, we men are awkward klutzes. There is some truth to the fact that attractive women have it easier to interact with people, the general statement is still shockingly wrong.
First, let us get the difficult case out of the way. Yes, it is true that an attractive woman pretty much only has to stand there and people, in particular men, will come talk to her. She does not even have to make much of an effort as thirsty guys will just carry the conversation. I can’t count how often guys told me about some allegedly smart woman they met. It invariably turned out that they simply met someone comparatively smart, when the comparison is with a ditz. Those guys were more than happy that a woman was able to demonstrate the most superfluous knowledge.
What normally happens is that those women tend to falter the moment you really dig deeper. I stopped asking any kind of probing questions after it became obvious to me that women who build an ego around their “edumacation” don’t take kindly to guys who show them how little they really know. In particular, I noticed this with women who were in the Social Sciences. They may want to impress you with this or that famous study they read, but they are hardly able to criticize it. Heck, most studies fall apart because their sample size is too small. Normally I got to hear a variation of “you’re just full of yourself” or “who do you think you are?”, and my dick didn’t get wet as a consequence either.
Yet, it seems to be the case that such women are used to getting praised for a bit of rote learning and regurgitating information. On the other hand, guys who are deep into a subject tend to battle it out verbally and try to strengthen their arguments. If you don’t have anything useful to say, people won’t tell you that you’re cute but instead you get told to shut up. Women often think they can parade their intellect around, akin to an expensive handbag. They normally don’t do so well in conversation. I can’t even think of a single woman who is noteworthy for her rhetoric prowess. Yet, I could name a dozen male master orators without even trying. On a side note, Camille Paglia is often used as an example of a very eloquent woman, but to me she suffers from verbal diarrhea and seemingly tries to steamroll people instead of constructing a proper and stringent argument.
The issue is that society holds women to a lower standard. In addition, thirsty men don’t dare to challenge them. Of course, such women don’t have much opportunity to really push themselves by engaging in intellectual debate. Heck, what do women write about or discuss? Sex, dieting fads, fitness, feminism. A few attempt social criticism, but among those, women who do not just parrot other people’s opinion are almost wholly absent. That does not keep Joe Beta from donating money to Lauren Southern and other women of their ilk. We would need more Karen Straughan’s, though.
All of this amounts to society playing softball with women who in turn think they can compete with men. Yet, just like with female diversity hires, the problem is that women who benefit from such schemes are often blissfully unaware of how deficient they are. Hey, they get paid the same as the men do, so they certainly are at least as good as those patriarchs because womyn are oppressed, right? On top, they don’t know of the more competent men whose job they have taken, so they end up feeling overly confident in their bubble. You may even get a job in the C suite of a huge corporation.
Being a reasonably young and attrative woman means that you get to live life on easy street. There will be problems further down the line, and that is precisely where we are going now. I have spent quite some time picking up women and by that I mean getting laid, not getting flakey phone numbers. Among others, this gave me an incredible wealth of experience with female behavior. What I found most staggering is that for some women, their world literally collapses once they enter their mid to late twenties.
“What may happen to them?”, you ask.
Here is one example: I used to date a young girl who had a severe social media addiction. She thought she was likeable, a good conversationalist, and also believed that she easily made friends. Her self-image was one of a smart and very popular person. (She did not like it when I pointed out to her that guys are only nice to her because they wanted to get laid. Also, she was of at best average intelligence, which made her behavior even more ridiculous.) To give you an idea of her personality, let me share one particular encounter with you guys.
We were hanging out at my place and about to watch a movie. The next day, she posted one quote of that movie on her Facebook wall and within one or two hours, close to 100 people, mostly guys, had commented on that. Now, imagine you post on your Facebook wall — back then that wall was actively used — something like “Just When I Thought I Was Out, They Pull Me Back In!”. That’s all you post. However, within two hours you have comments the length of your arm on your screen. There were guys who wrote a fucking paragraph in response to a movie quote. It was mindboggling to me. To put things in comparison, if I’d post a movie quote, I may get one or two likes out of pity but that would be it. Probably someone would ask me whether I’m alright. As a young, hot girl, though, it does not matter what you spout out because an army of thirsty beta men is just waiting to respond to you.
For how long do you think girls ride that wave? Not very long. In the case above, she became incredibly bitter after she realized that I was right and that guys really didn’t think she was a good conversationalist or particularly interesting to talk to. Her countless friends disappeared. Every aging woman makes the same experience until they end up as cat ladies if they don’t see the writing on the wall and get a beta husband.
If such women really had great social skills and were, for instance, great conversationalists and hugely popular, then their fading looks would be irrelevant. After all, you hang out with ugly mofos if they are interesting people. By the time women realize that they have been had, it is too late. They not only wonder where all the “good men” have gone — all the hangers-on are gone, too. I don’t even think that women can win this game. Those who don’t get raised as princesses probably have a fighting chance, but little Amanda who quickly learns the lesson that having a pussy is a great way to coast through life and doesn’t realize that she’ll get old very quickly does not stand a chance.
Ye had the same sort experience with an ex. She really believed people people were nice because she was so social. Even when she was a total bitch. Most guys would simply take her crap because she was hot. The thing that surprises me more. Is that most women also accept more from her. Probably trying to climb the social ladder by associating with the hot girl. It was frustrating at times to watch how people would let her win any argument. Worst thing about it. She would get real angry at the people that really cared about her. Because those people would tell her the truth. While at the same time. She would praise all the two faced a-holes for being so nice. Her judgment really sucked most of the time.
This is more related to the previous post, but since you mentioned Southern and Straughan…
You’re all absolutely right about conservathots. Lauren Southern, Blonde, Roaming Millennial, Faith Goldy: I had heard about all of them. Nothing about Karen Straughan.
I think I get a pass because I’m not an active YouTube user (I get most of my nonfake international news from skimming my Twitter feed). But it’s sad that most “redpilled” guys still follow the same pattern as everyone else with pretty women that have little interesting to say.
Most guys are like sheep, no matter which subculture they subscribe to. However, some of the prominent people in the red pill community are critical thinkers, which is not what you could say about many other subcultures.
Maybe you can look up Barbarossa also known as barbar on youtube. And Stardusk also known as Thinking ape. They have some quality work as well. It’s red pill / mgtow contend without drama. It’s more intellectually stimulating than most red pill / mgtow stuff. They are more about discussing the core philosophy.
Aaron,
Could you explain how one would de-sheepify oneself? Maybe a trail of readings to strengthen critical thinking skills? I realize it’s probably mostly genetic.
That would be a long post if not a book on its own. I’ll think about it further down the line.
Thanks, no need to post this comment.
A great way to see how much average women suck at social skillz is to go to a club past midnight, not drink and sit at the bar and observe. Average girls are so bad at flirting, it’s not even funny. Oh and most of them don’t dance that well either, why else they all stand in circles with their “best friends”.
Exactly, ditto.
why else they all stand in circles with their “best friends”.
Instinctively? Cows and sheep do the same thing.
Sleazy, do you think women are better at “reading” social cues? Like sizing up a guy, noticing body language, subtle gestures, voice, etc etc etc.
I think women do get experience at dealing with men (than vice versa) since guys are the ones approaching them or orbiting them.
I do take issue when mainstream media gush with praise how women are: natural communicators; natural leaders; natural care-givers; natural this; and… natural that!
Guys are portrayed as cavemen though (of course)!
I really have my doubts. I think I can read people extremely well. Most women couldn’t read me at all. They merely saw what they wanted to see. An alternative explanation is that women can read you but just don’t care about your emotions. Particularly in the case of your typical Western woman, that is a plausible assumption to make.
It’s rather easy. If you know yourself you get good at knowing/reading people.
Multiple ways to get to know yourself. Seems meditation was what helped you, Aaron.
Can be a job experience, too.
I think it’s one of those cases where:
– there’s a kernel of truth
– that creates a stereotype
– the stereotype makes people blow it out of proportion
It is a biological fact that females can read better than males. On average their brains are better-wired for it. But it’s only a degree better. It’s not like they are 300-400-500% better or anything crazy like that.
Unfortunately because of the stereotype, many women have been brainwashed (or brainwashed themselves) into believing that they’re these telepathic know-it-all who know the exact intent for any man at any time.
Curiously, this belief kicks in specifically for men, and specifically to bash men or bragplain. Funny how they don’t believe they’re as telepathic for what other women’s intentions were.
“Oh that dude that crossed the street at the same time as me, he was totally stalking me, I could tell”.
What about you Sleazy Gal? Did your supreme social skills enable you to snare the sleazy @Aaron S. Elias??
That certainly played a role. Her social and conversational skills are well above average.
Great question if “women are better at “reading” social cues”!
Based on my own experience i think for some women its true and they’re way above average. Just think about a (good!) waitress, saleswoman or a hooker. Their success and tips are based on how good they can “read” customers, manipulate them…
Most of the women – and men – are awful at reading ppl and prospectively it wont get better, reading ppl is a skill you have to develop and train and “generation smartphone” grows up socially crippled.
In short: if a person is good at reading social cues, its because he/she (financially) is dependend on it and has developed it.
I may have tried a few things myself, but I sure felt like I was the one ensnared during courtship. Not that I’m complaining 😉 Sleazy’s brazen approach was on a wholeee new level, which according to him was already him taking it slower (no, we did not meet in a club or at a party).
Another simple observation:
Humor is obviously a social skill as it is more often than not of situational nature.
If womyn were oh-so socially skilled as they claimed to be, we’d have more (and funnier) female stand up comedians.
“I don’t even think that women can win this game.”
Well, if they use their youth and looks to snare a good husband, pop out a couple of kids, and treat the people around them well so that as they age those people will care for them – that’s a win.
That was rushed. I meant to speak about women in general, which is why this sentence is followed by the statement that some women have a fighting chance. Their best outcome is what you describe.