A friend of mine recently sent me a screenshot of a video ad with the German top model Toni Garrn, once one of the most highly paid models in the world. She will turn 32 in a few days and, just like all women before her, her looks declined with her age. Toni Garrn may be an interesting topic for a separate post, but this one is about something else: as I sat down and pondered about modelling as a career and the short duration of this career path, I was wondering if there are women out there who are so deluded that they are trying to break into modelling at an age when the wall is right in front of them, and when saner women would try to get out, desperately looking for a plan B.

If there is one certainty you can have then it is that in clown world, your thinking cannot be absurd enough. Reality will still be stranger. Within about a minute, I found a post so deluded that it I had to pause and think about whether it was pure satire. Even if the original post is satirical, it is entirely believable and consistent with observed female behavior, and so are the responses. Without further ado, let us have a look at the plan of a self-declared overweight, and thus probably a really fat, woman to break into modelling as her youth is fading rapidly: Can I start a career at 28 years old?, taken from r/modelling (Reddit).

The mere headline gave me pause: 28. Modelling. New Career. Is this woman out of her mind? Is she unaware that she looks not even remotely as good as she did at 18? I think this woman needs to be deluded at a level close to clinical insanity if she thought this was realistic. At this point, we don’t know yet that she is fat, but the headline alone is enough to dismiss her. It is as if some guy in his late 20s who has never played basketball would ask if it was a good idea to break into professional sports, despite never having played sports in his life.

Hello everyone,

Can I start a career at 28 years old?

No, you can’t. You are competing against untold numbers of much younger and much better-looking women. How big is your Instagram or OnlyFans? Do you make any money with it? The Internet is a freely accessible attention economy. If any woman cannot get traction online, it will be even more difficult offline.

I would like to do editorials, couture and runaway.

Note: “Editorials” are the spreads in the middle of a magazine, e.g. Playboy centerfolds. “Couture” is short for “high couture”, i.e. working for luxury brands. One cannot say that this woman is without ambition. The hypothetical late-20s guy may as well aim at playing in the NBA.

I am a tall woman, in the process of losing weight (I think I can reach the industry’s standards). I have been spotted by two successful photographers. One thought I was a high fashion model and the other have proposed me to pose for him.

Alright, she is fat but she believes she can lose the weight. On top, two random guys were hitting on her once. I bet no woman has had happen something similar to her ever. Asking a woman if she is a model is one of the corniest pickup lines out there but it is also one of the more effective ones. Ask a basic bitch you are out on a date with if she has ever done any modelling on the side, and watch the reactions! It works best with women who put on a ton of makeup, basically your 6s or 7s who believe they are 9s and 10s.

However, I know that the industry hire mostly teenagers and that most models see their careers end at 25.

No, they are not. Instead, they are waiting for a fat 28-year-old who built a fantasy around some creepy guy asking if he can take some pictures of her. You can do it!

My chances are that I live in Paris. I have done extensive research about the modelling industry. I was passionate about fashion way before even thinking about becoming a model. I think that maturity can play in my favor.

See, she knows what is up: she only has to walk the streets of Paris, hoping to get spotted by a model scout. Of course, there is the added difficulty that she needs to avoid getting raped by a vibrant enricher. Wait, what would happen if Abdul pulled out his smartphone and said to her, “Bootifull girl, can I take picksha?” This would probably not lead to a pretty ending.

In the real world, it seems that future supermodels get discovered anywhere. You can even send in your portrait shots to modelling agencies. Why does she not try that? I can tell you why: she knows that she would get ignored, so it is much better for her ego to keep living in a fantasy world. Also, “maturity” does not really help in modelling. Aside from MILF porn, I cannot think of any other category where older women would be in greater demand than young women. With 28, she would just about be the right age for breaking into that niche, though.

The comments are about as critical as you would expect:

if you think you have what it takes, try. But not just, “Oh I think I could do that and do this”… it needs to be a “I can do this and that but better and in my own way”.

Yes, everybody is a special snowflake.

I am an agent (from Paris too!) and we have signed a girl who was 30 last year. It’s really about how you look and not your age.

Quick! You only need to send him some nudes and he will sign you too.

Just do it! I’m in LA and I’m 27, I applied to over 100 agencies over the weekend and already got a few call backs for interviews 🙂 I tried to apply 5 years ago and there were age restriction on a lot of these agencies, but this time around I think only 3 out of the hundred I applied had a strict age limit.

What kind of agency did this woman apply to? On a side note, LA is infamous for an entire caste of people wanting to become stars. Every waitress is actually an actress. There are also huge numbers of “Hollywood hopefuls” who never make it as their career peters out soon after it seemingly got off the ground.

You live in Paris! It’s possible!

No comment. This thread could only have been better if she had not been living in Paris, leading to anonymous posters on Reddit encouraging her to uproot her life and move to Paris, Milan, or London in pursuit of her dream.

J.Lo is in her 50s and she looks better than people I know in their 20s! LOL. Robert Frost received acclaim in his 50s. If you have a dream, don’t let anyone stop you– even yourself. Put your all in and go for it!

Jennifer Lopez’ fame has been completely astroturfed. I recall the mainstream media talking about how great her ass was when it was nothing special. Not even in her 20s did this woman look particularly good. Of course, you can always find some random 20 year old who looks worse than a washed up has-been like J.Lo. Robert Frost is obviously a guy, and a poet, so he is not relevant in this context. This comment is likely meant to be ironic. If not, it comes from a woman who has mastered the are of delusion to an extreme degree.

Right at the bottom of that page there are two comments that make sense:

Not if you need to ask

Indeed.

I’m a current model. Honestly it is very difficult to begin modeling at 28 if you don’t have previous experience. It can take many years to build your portfolio and get the jobs you want. I personally began at 17 and am 28 now and still working as a model. It really depends on your appearance. If you still look young and the agencies think they can get a few years from you then it’s definitely possible! Best thing to do is just try!

This one is a lot more realistic. Arguably, a 28-year-old would need to look absolutely exceptional but even then I find it quite implausible that there is a path towards, “editorials, couture and runaway”. Also, based on what I have heard, models are very catty towards each other. A 28-year old in the same changing room as a bunch of women in their late teens would get mocked relentlessly.