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We’ve made the analogy of the spotlight with girls who are into you (green), not into you (red), and undecided/grey area (yellow), right? Is it even possible that a girl who’s a red sends you a nude picture? Has social media gone all the way towards detaching the online world from reality when it comes to sexual intent?
I would think the girl I’m thinking of by commenting this was very much a yellow, but extremely flakey. The situation was, she’s an emigrant down South, coming home for holidays, only stays for a month at most, doesn’t live in the same town where I live or work. Concretely, she told me she couldn’t be bothered to meet up, the day after showing me her tits. I know the circumstances make it a hassle for her (and for me as well TBH), but in other times, girls from even the generation before would feel kind of compelled to at least go out after showing the goods for free. Am I crazy here?
This sounds odd. Could she be starving for attention or perhaps looking for new subscribers to her OnlyFans page? An alternative hypothesis, as you also state, is extreme flakiness. There are women who aggressively flirt with several guys and then they almost on a whim decide on whom to meet up with. Related is the phenomenon of women who have a boyfriend, yet go out and party. Some of them seemingly need to negotiate with themselves if it is OK if they dance with you, or hug, kiss, leave with you. Even when they are in bed with you, they may engage in absurd mental gymnastics. Basically every time you end up banging them anyway, but they may tell you some bullshit beforehand such as that they can only blow you because they have a boyfriend or that they want to fuck you but only with a condom, and only if you do not cum inside them. Apparently this is reserved for her boyfriend. In summary, some women are pretty crazy and trying to explain their behavior may be futile.
All your options sound plausible, except for the second one. The girl’s 16 (yeah, I know), so no Onlyfans (yet).
TBH, beside the obvious factor I mentioned above, the girl was all over the place: already 4 tattoos and planning for more (the dad’s a tattoo artist, go figure), sexual experience with guys, some lesbian action (non-sexual, she claimed), kind of weird incestuous vibes with her brother… A giant red flag. I shouldn’t even have tried anything, to be frank, but the psychology behind girls just giving out nudes (this one was with auto-delete so I didn’t keep it, which would be stupid in the first place) without wanting to follow up is what has me wondering.
@PN
Sounds like you were in the maybe pile ,
she sends u a Tit shot based on that (she dropped her ‘bait’ in the water)
,Then Probably cos there was no following offer of you travelling to meet her based on the the bait ,she decided u were a red and binned u as an option.
So logistics are bad and no indicator that u will close the distance. So ,binned.
I don’t recall a time where after a nude the girl is compelled to do anything. Nudes don’t have much value really. It’s so commonplace now to exchange them. Sometimes it’s just a straight up prick tease from the chicks side if she’s bored and wants to mess w a few guys online even.
I’ve heard that a few times from chicks.
They just give guys a rev up and leave em hanging for shits and giggles w their chick mates.
@CJ:
You were addressing me, right? Not Pickernanny, which would be the implication of calling out one “PN”.
And that’s what I said at the beginning, that I was a yellow (i.e. in the maybe pile), definitely not a green. To paint a more complete picture, yes, I repeatedly said I wanted to go to whatever place worked best for her and meet up at least twice. See, when we started texting, her plan (or rather, her family’s) was for her to stay indefinitely, and the context was that I was wooing her for a LTR (she was, uh-hum, underage after all, despite the tattoos being an obvious red flag, but that’s a whole other issue). A lot of things could have suddenly put me on the red category (another guy, the age gap, etc.), but the obvious choice seems to be the change of plans. I went from an older guy with provider potential to an older guy who would probably only be good for a ONS, and she will probably choose some buff bad boy type who’s younger than 25 for that, if at all.
With the above context, you guys may think that the situation is much more straightforward, and it is. It’s the “I showed you my boobs yesterday but today I shoot down your claims” part that mystified me.
@Manuel.
My bad I misread who did the OP. Was addressed to u not PN.
I guess my point was nudie pics don’t mean much one way or t’other these days. It’s just a show off to gauge the guys interest I guess.
She may change her mind in a short space of time after sending a tit shot for many unknown reasons.
Sooo, funny story…..
One of my regular lovers has been wanting to fulfill a threesome fantasy for a while, so she set up a profile on a website and started messaging people for us to meet. I let her carry on the interactions as she is the shy one of the two. She matched up with several women and couples, some of them quite good looking ones, over the span of 3 weeks or so.
Long story short, she is now fuming because she found out first hand how flakey women are, and its hilarious to watch. I told her to keep things cool and detached, and not indulge in too many fantasies until we actually meet one of them in person. Yet after investing lots of time in chatting, flirting, and exchanging photos and even nudes, they will flake or ghost without much explanation, and she is now equal parts horny, disappointed, frustrated, and angry.
Welcome to a man´s dating world, honey!, I told her laughing.
She told me to tell you guys, in the name of women, sorry for being such bitches. She understands it now. LoL
Yeah, I remember a while ago someone linked to a Dateline or 60 Minutes episode where a lesbian feminist went undercover as a man. Thinking she would benefit from our “patriarchal society.”. She was blown away by how hard it was to just get a date. I also know a woman who thought speed dating and Internet dating was “too much work.” 😂
I sadly don’t have time to stick around right now, but allow me to share another woman that made a similar (albeit a lot more lighthearted than the feminist that decided to rope upon the brutal exposure to our reality as men. I wonder how many other feminists learned from hearing her story…) realization:
Tee-hee.
This kind of relates to my post above. But fishing for girls/couples interested in threesomes is some next-level shit, so there’s at least a more logical explanation for extreme flakiness.
@GLS that might have been me, I have once or twice linked to Norah Vincent and her “self made man” project, where she disguised herself as a man and went undercover into male spaces. It was an eye opening experience for her and many viewers, not least of all because of her honesty in reporting what she found and experienced.
She was a psychologically troubled woman, and I was so sad to hear she killed herself a few years later.
Heres a link to a summary
Yes, I think it was you. That’s exactly what I was referring to. It really hurts to hear that she killed herself. She was a visionary.
I I agree with her that men need to hug more. Hell, professional athletes do it, so why not us?
I looked more into Norah Vincent. Didn’t realize she wrote for the LA Times and was a widely circulated journalist. Damn what a tragic case. She died of *assisted* suicide at only 53 years old (In Switzerland, this could never fly in the US). And she was not in any physically unlivable situation. Her temporary life as a man was directly related to her psychological tail spin. RIP.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XsQwfYngw6c
Ah, the Solipsism. This chick definitely needs to hear the story of Norah.
Gotta say. I’m a bit jealous.
I’ve been looking for a decent chick with a 3-way on her fantasy list for a while now and also one that will do the legwork like yours. Only found one that wants to “share” me in these past few months of hookups. But she is not great quality, I showed her a pic of another chick I’m chatting to who is very into threeways and groups. She liked this other chicks look and found her Hot ..but wanted to meet her first and ‘check the connection’ cos she “doesn’t want to fuck a stranger” blah blah.
This is the problem afaics this requirement of chicks to meet the other chick. It can fuckup the chances as chicks are nit-picky.
I’d rather just rock up a chicks place with another gamey chick and do it impromptu. The less comms the better imo. She’ll prob go along with it as soon as we all start watching porn and get turned on I would think.
@James
Yeah, threesomes are a bit tricky in that way. Its already enough work to find 2 people who want to fuck each other, finding three is exponentially more so. It is easier when you hook up with other people in a swinger club (been there done that), but you lose on the safety and intimacy side.
If u hook up with another girl/guy/couple in a club, the sexual contact will be (or should be) very limited for safety reasons (condoms strictly enforced at all times) and usually only one time. At least that was my exp.
If you hook up with ppl in a more personal and intimate manner, it can get better and more dirty in a good way. But it is a lot more work.
@Yarara
U speak the truth.
I attended a Sex Club a few weeks back for the first time . Soon after arriving I got propositioned by couple for a 3 way in the play room. Chat was very transactional and easy. We like you / Y or N/ N? Ok seeya..
I declined but in hindsight I ought to have taken them on the offer. The rest of the night went to shit.
MFM threesomes are easier to get . On the swinger apps.
I’ve been thinking maybe the best way is to talk about MFF 3-way early in the app chat to seed and screen for it there firstly. Maybe better odds to find two on the app that’ll entertain it and just invite both over at the same time without telling the other (?).
The sneaky method I guess.
I got propositioned in regular clubs for an MFM threesome a few times. It was always the woman approaching me, and they were not very forthcoming with the key information that there was another dude in the picture. It was also not always clear whether he was completely fine with it.
@Cheeky
Bad idea to lie to them, you wont be able to keep up whatever it is you told them and if they feel you lied to them they will bail quite quickly.
It looks to me that the people you really want to meet are the ones that will be more picky. My girl got me to interview a couple for a foursome, for example, but she had not been entirely honest to them about our own relationship. I tried to be as honest as I could, but they sensed something was off and decided not to go through with it.
Sex clubs have their own etiquette, of course, but as you say the interaction is much more direct and transactional. When you are inviting someone over to your place, or if they are going to allow you into yours, I think you want a somewhat higher theshold of trust.
Regarding threesomes, I have not yet seen that 3 random strangers, be it MMF or FFM, pair up to spontaneously fuck. Its almost always a couple looking for a single girl or guy. As a single person, esp a single woman, the fact that these people you plan having sex with are already in a relationship sort of vouches for the fact that they are not complete creeps or weirdos, and that they probably take some precautions regarding their sexual health.
I dont know where you live, but here it seems to me that FFM threesomes are much more common than MMF ones. And my girl scouring the sex contacts website reports the same, its much more frequent to find couples looking for girls than for guys. So I think your best bet may be to get a steady girl, not necessarily a girlfriend, but a more or less regular lover you can explore this with.
And if possible let her find and talk to the girls of interest, women being women are going to be more selective than you, so its important they like each other from the beginning in order to have better chances to succeed.
Also, its common etiquette in a swinger club as well: if you like a couple, approach the man and introduce yourself to him first. If you have a woman with you and she wants to approach, she should talk to the woman first. This shows respect for boundaries. If you want to initiate an exchange in a common sex area, the initial contact can be done non-verbally, you can touch the person of the opposite sex but make sure it is in a non-erogenous area like the shoulder or forearm. If your hand is pushed away, thats a clear no. And never ever question it if someone says no (its rude, and in some instances it may get you kicked out by security). However, if they grab your hand and move it to an erogenous body part, thats a green light, but you still have to escalate prudently to test how far they allow you to go.
It is possible that rules are different in your country, I expect there to be some cultural variation. You should corroborate this with google, club employees, or more experienced clubgoers.
@ yarara
Thanks for the advice. I will be making notes on all of that 👍
I forgot about the trust and safety parts and the importance of that thanks for the reminder.
a salient point. And usually the biggest concern for chicks hey…probably why they want to meet and vet the other chick first. To (a) make sure she’s her type for sex but (b) also not a ‘Fatal Attraction’-loony type that will bring drama afterward either (I’m guessing?).
So yeah lying won’t work ur right,
And I’d probably lose both chicks in the process.
Seems like it’s tricky business indeed and takes a while and best let the chick do the legwork and vetting as you say.
It’s tricky doing it sober and straight anyway for sure.
IME from hearing stories it’s common for a lot of chicks to get their 3-way experiences when drink and drugs are involved. In their clubbing and drugs phase. As the inhibitions are low from the substances and it “just happened” cos all parties were high.
I’ve hooked up with a married couple off an app a while back it was quite random and last minute.it went quite well but was a once off. She was quite hot and it was a eye opening experience.
Re the sex club etiquette yes that’s the same advice I got from my cougar chick on the night. Re the Touch signals for a Go or No-Go.
My rotation is starting to dwindle now so it’s unlikely for me. It’s either a feast or a famine for me with chicks it seems. Meh!
Cheers CJ
Same crap just happened with another good (at least on paper) prospect. Same deal, already showed me even more than tits, started ghosting me for no reason, except for maybe her period. At least this one had the excuse that she got all offended because I called her out on her bullshit. I’ve lost a good deal of potential lays because I do that instead of, I don’t know, playing it cool, ignoring the shit-test and coming back again next week, but I just can’t stand women’s irrational behavior without saying something.
Anyway, I’m already bummed out about the whole “meeting girls on SM” thing that I’ve relied on for years now. I don’t like using anglo-saxon generational lingo for other societies but, for simplification, let’s just say that late-millennial/zoomer girls are for the most part broken inside by modernity and SM, and by initiating contact there I’m filtering the worst of the lot for myself. There’s one last girl and, if it doesn’t work, I’ll start looking for a partner only through real life…
@Manuel
Be careful of calling them out too much on the bullshit. That’s better done after the lay imo.
They often need a bit of bullshit to hide behind…(or something like that) better to make fun of it indirectly. And let them know that U also know the game.
@CJ: tell me about it! The thing is, the possibility of shit tests/flakiness increases the more time passes without a date materializing, and I’ve lost my onlline tolerance as I’ve gotten older (in person I’m fine).
My line of work doesn’t lend itself to hooking up except for when you do it with local girls from the place where the project is. Right now, I’m in a tourist town and, if I wanted a simple hook-up, I’d have no excuse, but I’m looking for a long term relationship. I almost got one here with a girl who looked like wife material, but the story of how that ended is a story for another thread, and so bizarre that you won’t believe it.
Thoughts on the passing of Johnny Berba
I was not aware of that. You can find my thoughts in this article I just posted.
Not sure if to post this under women, clown world or misc…. so lets do it here.
Perhaps some of you may remember that in early 2018 I posted about a reasonably hot, 19yo girl in my home country (Argentina), who killed her boyfriend in cold blood. She had a troubled relationship with this guy, by all accounts. And apparently, one night she took a 9mm handgun from her father (who was a policeman), and shot her boyfriend through the back while they were riding a scooter. She then shot him a second time when he was lying on the ground.
After, she returned home and began leaving false clues to misdirect investigators, like sending whatsapp messages to her now deceased boyfriend. And then she tried framing her father. And she trotted out all the tired excuses about patriarchy, sexual abuse, domestic abuse, gender biased justice system, etc….
Interestingly for a young girl, the victim framing did not seem to work much. No one but the most rabid leftwing nuts defend her anymore, apparently. Today, after several long years of convictions and appeals, her pussy privilege has finally been declined definitively – the Supreme Court confirmed her life sentence, which means she will effectively remain in prison until 2052 (life sentence here usually tops out at 35 years, and she has been in prison since the crime already). She now becomes the youngest female killer to ever be convicted to life in prison in the history of this country.
source (in Spanish): https://www.lanacion.com.ar/seguridad/detenida-hasta-2052-la-corte-rechazo-el-ultimo-recurso-que-tenia-nahir-galarza-y-dejo-firme-la-nid26112024/
Argentina is at the same time one of the most woke-infected Latin American countries and one of the most based ones.
“And then she tried framing her father.”
Out of curiosity, was there any information on how her relationship is with her father in general before this incident?
Really scary how some people can just throw even loved ones under the bus like that. Classic Sociopathy.
@Manuel
yeah, we got plenty of leftist scum here, ever since the 1960s. At least they are not armed anymore, almost all the leftists who took up arms were killed by our military between 1976 and 1983. Regrettably, a rather large bunch of them were left alive to infect our politics after the return to democracy (and non leftist politicians were too pussified to really stand up to them).
OTOH, we just got ourselves our own south american knockoff of Donald Trump. To be honest, there is plenty about him that I dislike, esp in international politics: align yourself with USA (the declining great power), support the genocidal country (Israel), support the country losing a proxy war (Ukraine), talk shit about the chinese who buy most of our exports….. it drives me nuts. But he is bringing public spending and inflation under control, and that is a big issue here. So I will very reluctantly support him for now.
@Maou
She said her relationship with her father was not good, that he was authoritarian and abusive,etc… but at the same time there are tweets from her defending him and cops generally. She says she was abused by a familiy member and he helped cover it up. And then she claimed he was the one who wanted her boyfriend dead, and he forced to play along. But there is not the slightest evidence that her father was anywhere near the murder of her BF.
TBH its sounds like a bunch of made up bullshit to me. Her mother separated from him at some point and moved to be closer to the prison where she is held, and supposedly she )i mean her mother) does vouch for some of the bad things she says about her father. Its a big mess, but even if true i dont see how any of this justifies killing your boyfriend in cold blood.
I mean, if I lost myshit after someone stole a bike from me and I got angry and empty a 9mm clip in them… I may feel morally justified, but Id still go to prison, and rightly so.
This is so similar to the United States. It is very rare for women to get the death penalty here. And if they are going to be executed, the media raises a shit storm. Especially if they are good looking. I guess even the law abides by the wall.
If they are accused they always blame men for it. They’re husband, they’re father etc. Lorena Bobbet cut off her husband’s dick, while he was asleep, and got away with it. In the initial police report her motive was that he didn’t give her an orgasm.
Real shit.
Then her defense team got her to change her story to that he was abusive physically to her. Add to that shitty prosecutors and a John Bobbit himself being a bad witness and you have severe injustice. Feminists outside the courthouse were raising two fingers, then motioning snip, snip snip in the air.