We have often talked about how to more effectively meet women, and how to have sex with them faster. On the other hand, women have it much simpler, at least in theory. In this article, I describe the ideal female dating strategy, which a lot of women seem to be quite unaware of and only few pursue actively.

The key part of the mating process among humans is that men approach whereas women signal their availability, however subtly. Thus, a woman only needs to show up, and this is the key part: she needs to show up in a place where she can meet potentially suitable men. This is the core of the ideal female dating strategy. Women are, quite apparently, driven to mingle and socialize. They like crowds and being the center of attention. However, this normally happens without a lot of self-reflection.

A lot of women go to events, concerts, clubs, etc., apparently hardly taking into account the caliber of men they are going to meet. There are also women who are aware that they are not in an environment where they can meet their ideal partner so they move to big cities like New York City, Los Angeles, London, or Berlin. However, once they are there they may again pursue suboptimal dating strategies, for instance working as a waitress and hoping that they will catch the eye of some rich, handsome guy who never comes.

Women simply need to go where the most eligible men are. This may mean trying really hard to get into a competitive degree program, not necessarily to work in their chosen field but to meet men who will. This used to work great when medicine was still male-dominated. Today, there are more women than men, so the chance of success is a lot lower. In the past, there was also a shortcut for women by becoming nurses and trying to seduce one of many doctors. By the time the men they want to target leave university, though, any of their female fellow students may have tied them down already, though.

Then there are degree programs at highly selective universities, albeit selection criteria may be somewhat non-meritocratic. Any young woman studying at Oxford and looking for a man who will likely go places may want to try to figure out where the guys studying Quantitative Finance hang out, for instance. Finding a husband in a preselected pool of applicants is not just plain theory. I went to some fairly selective universities and I have seen women systematically looking for the sons of wealthy fathers. This is a bit like playing the lottery but the odds are, albeit low, significantly higher. I know of one woman, a somewhat mediocre-looking one in fact, who managed to snag a very wealthy guy from Southern Europe. I also know women who did not succeed at snagging an eligible bachelor at university but then they managed to get into a big bank and came across some horny vice president (VP) and sealed the deal. On a side note, there are a lot of VPs in banking. It is basically the same level as “senior X” in other industries. A senior engineer in tech may have the same years of experience and position on the corporate ladder as a vice present in banking.

Some women even attempt to get in front of the rich and famous. I saw this first-hand in St. Tropez, with women trying to get the attention of guys they perceived to be rich. Most guys there surely are, but the really rich are very difficult to reach as these are the guys who have their own yacht. Still, there is a surprising number of gold-digging women flying in. They share a hotel room with two or three other girls and their only goal is to get a rich guy. The competition is tough as the looks threshold is really high. Women normally quickly realize that they are not cut out for this, otherwise they would be models or actresses. There are of course very attractive women who are not models or actresses but there is a clear correlation, at least outside of Netflix and present-day Hollywood.

I was told that oftentimes dancers from Paris, when they want to get out in their mid-20s, party in St. Tropez for one or two summers, trying to find a rich guy. This surely works for some, but not for all. You can imagine how tough the competition there is. Yet, I have also come across women who are not very attractive and well past their prime. They save up all year so that they can kind of afford two weeks in St. Tropez, and then just hang around there. People tolerate them but they are not really desired by anybody. They ask if they can join a group. People do not want to blatantly send them away because everyone is friendly, and then they just sit there, not getting much attention. I have even seen women sitting close to a group of six or seven people, pretending to be part of it. It is sad to see. This also happened to my group. There were several women who asked us if it was fine if they sat next to us. In contrast, the young and very attractive ones dance in front of your table or they may even strike up a conversation, asking if they can drink and party with you. This is even more likely to happen if the area in front of your table becomes crowded.

No matter what angle a young woman pursues, given that women want guys to ideally meet a particular looks threshold and be decent providers, the best way of maximizing their success is if they get in front of as many potentially suitable mates as possible. That is it. There is no equivalent shortcut for guys, though. Sure, you can save up money so that you can drop $3k on a table and drinks in a VIP club but the women there will quickly figure out that you cannot afford this lifestyle. Women get by on looks. As a guy you are either born rich or you try to work your way up and acquire resources.